Don’t listen to those thoughts
Deeply rooted in your commitment to that dysfunctional relationship was the desire to have a partner. You wanted to give love and receive love. You don’t want a life without that. So, letting go of something that showed promise of that – it failed, but it showed promise – can be difficult. You may want to hang onto that crappy lifeboat for fear that a bigger, better ship isn’t coming. Matthews says these thoughts are common after a breakup (but, again, no reason to take the partner back). “Some of the negative thoughts one might have after a breakup include ‘I’m never going to find anyone else like my former mate,’ ‘It was all might fault,’ ‘This pain will never go away,’ ‘I’m worthless and I’m never entering another relationship.’” You can go ahead and ignore those.