Use self-care as a guiding light
Knowing when a compromise is taking things too far or is causing you to lose yourself can be hard, but it’s easier if you do regular check-ins with yourself. “It’s important that people stay in touch with who they are through practices of self-love. Make sure they have me-time where they’re quietly in tune with who they are and what they desire in their lives,” Howard says. “So often people get into relationships and they lose themselves because they don’t have a relationship with themselves anymore.” When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to start judging every personal desire you have by the standard of, “But will my partner like that?” and there’s value in having time when you simply ask, “Is this what works for me?” But it’s hard to think like that if you never spend time alone.