Ask a Very Smart Brotha: He Got Someone Else Pregnant But Says He Wants to Be With Me

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Carmen: I am dating a guy who is post divorced 6 months… He is everything I am looking for in a mate but every so often he will say that he wants to be open with one another so he can explore other options because he was heartbroken. My response to him was he has heal and forgive in order to accept his blessing in the future. I told him we will be friends since I know he isn’t ready for a relationship. He says he only wants me but wants me to wait until he is ready. I value our friendship but am torn since I care deeply for him. Do I keep him as a friend or leave him alone?

DY: If I were you, I’d scale back some, and stop thinking about relationship for now. For one, he just went through a divorce, and you have no idea where his head is at right now. Why? Because he probably has no idea.

Also, you don’t want to be the rebound, or the woman who gets dumped after a few months because the guy realized he really wanted to just be single for a while.

Pittsburgh native Damon Young (aka “The Champ”) is the co-founder of the ridiculously popular Their first book “Your Degrees Won’t Keep You Warm At Night: The Very Smart Brothas Guide To Dating, Mating and Fighting Crime” is available at

If you have a relationship question you would like Damon to answer, feel free to email us at or join us on our Facebook page on Wednesdays at 1 pm.

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