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I’m a firm believer in discretion, especially on social networking sites and of all things in relationships.  You may have been misled by the belief that partners in relationships have no secrets, but trust me when I say: loose lips sink relationships.  This can be a challenging thought for most women since naturally (yes, something else you can blame those damn XX chromosomes for) women think that the best solution to a problem is to talk it through and get it all out there.  We think there are magical combinations within language that will solve every problem.  But frankly, there are some things in relationships that once revealed end up hurting the relationship more than it helping it.  By dissecting and analyzing every conflict with a conversation, you may be in fact creating a bigger problem than you began with.  The next time your guy tells you that you talk too much, he might actually have a point.

I’m not talking about deceit, and I’m not talking about lying by omission.  For example, if you slept over your ex-boyfriend’s house last night and not your bestie’s, the information is probably going to hurt the relationship once revealed, but it will also allow your partner to make a clear and informed decision regarding the relationship because he/she has all of the facts.  On the other hand, I personally believe that things that took place before the relationship sometimes lay unnecessary groundwork for mistrust and jealousy, and those are two things that can surreptitiously sink a relationship over time.   The truth is, some things are frankly not any of your partner’s business and once he/she has knowledge of certain aspects of your past, they may subconsciously be distracted from who you truly are in the present.

What’s your take on the following situations?  Do you feel like your partner should know EVERYTHING about your past?

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