Ask a Very Smart Brotha Live: High School Sweethearts & Love Languages

Brandy: Damon, I have been divorced for about four years now and haven’t really been seriously dating anyone. I went back to school and just took some time to get my mind right. I have only very recently felt that I was open to the option of being in a relationship again. Problem being, I just feel so far removed from the scene- I tend to run people away, yet I always hear from them later on and they say things like I scared them, they didn’t think I was real- and that’s with or without sex. I’m just me- I’m cool, no kids, play video games, watch cartoons, read a lot. Not trying to lock somebody down right off, just wanna hang out. How do I get my mojo back? How can I not be so “scary” What am I doing wrong? HELP!!!

D.Y.: Before I begin, lemme just say that getting back out there after ending a long relationship isn’t an easy thing to do for anyone, so don’t feel bad that you’re having some trouble right now. Right now, if I were you, I’d go to as many game nights and professional happy hours and events at your college as possible. Not necessarily to meet men, but to just get around people and get used to having fun again. I think that’ll help you relax some, and that new, relaxed mindset will likely carry over to your dating life. Plus, like I’ve said numerous times here, men are drawn to women who look like they’re having a good time. So, go have a good time!