Ask a Very Smart Brotha Live: High School Sweethearts & Love Languages

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Monika: Damon: I have a friend and we’ve been friends for a little over seven years; I’m kinds interested in him & I think we’d be good together but there is something keeping me from giving anything and its communication. Ill text or call and don’t hear back until days later and he’ll say he was busy with work. Does this mean he isn’t interested or is my gut right for having me a little upset? It only takes a few seconds to say hello. Right?

D.Y.: If this was a guy you’d recently met and you were interested in him (and he knew you were interested), I’d agree that him taking a while to get back to you is a sure sign that he’s just not that into you. Sure, we (men) can get busy, but no man on Earth is too busy to say hey to a woman he’s feeling. Your situation, though, is different. Sounds like you’re just friends, and you’ve been friends for a long time. Right now he probably treats your texts the same way I treat texts from friends; if it’s urgent or interesting I’ll respond right away. If not, you’ll probably get one of those “Damn…I’m just now seeing this text. My bad” replies two days later.

Monika: Okay so with that being said, should I say anything to him about it or just let it slide assuming it wont change? To be honest I’m too old (not really, I’m 34 but you get it) to go round and round. I mean should I even say how I feel? My gut is telling MD no until he gets right with the communication. We’ve been in each other’s lives this long he should kinda know what annoys me because I’ve fussed before about other folks. Lol

D.Y.: I mean, if he’s been this way as long as you’ve known him, and you’re still good friends, what incentive does he have to change?

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