Be proactive instead of reactive
The best way to set a boundary is before it’s even been crossed. Don’t wait for an incident to occur before setting it. Be proactive instead of reactive. “In my book I have a section on questions to ask early on in dating. Those include things like finances, how you deal with extended family, your relationships with people you may be attracted to, what do you consider infidelity, what is your boundary style,” Tawaab says. “Sometimes when couples show up in therapy they haven’t talked about these things yet.” She says you should take opportunities early on to bring these things up.