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being single on valentine's day

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Reports show that, in order from most to least, this is who receives Valentine’s Day gifts: wives, girlfriends, other family members, husbands, “secret” recipients (whatever that means), boyfriends, friends, pet dogs, and pet cats. Notice the positioning of the friends in that group as right down there with pet dog and cats. How can we treat our friends like that? Perhaps we don’t think a friend would ever expect any sort of special attention on Valentine’s Day, but do you remember in elementary school when students made Valentine cards for everyone? It was important that nobody felt left out. Where did that spirit go? It is true all the things they say about the 14th being a commercial holiday created by Hallmark and similar companies who prey on our need to prove our love and feel loved, but look, it seems to be here to stay. And the same can be said of many other major holidays.

Then again, other major holidays don’t seem to exclude one very particular group: singles. Anybody and everybody feels welcome to partake in Halloween or the Fourth of July. But Valentine’s Day can be like that b*tchy popular girl in high school who closed the talking circle when she sensed a “not cool” person approaching. It is important to be sensitive to the fact that single people can feel left out on this holiday. It’s also important not to make it too obvious when that being sensitive about it. Nobody wants pity. Here are things not to say to your single friends on Valentine’s Day.

Ugh, you’re lucky. You don’t have to buy a gift

While you’re desperately searching for a gift that won’t make your partner want to gag and resenting the price tag on everything because you know your partner doesn’t even want a gift, you may be thinking, “It’d be best if I were single on this day.” And you might want to express that sentiment to your single friend. But the idea there is that, wouldn’t everyone gladly give up love and connection if it meant saving a couple of bucks on these stupid holidays? And, no, nobody really feels that way. Also, if we are looking at relationships from a monetary standpoint, your friend knows there are financial perks to being coupled up. You save money on things like rent and fajitas for two by being in a relationship. You aren’t fooling anyone.

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