Movie Grand Gestures That Are Awkward In Real Life
Grand gestures always go well in movies, but we forget that that’s because they are movies. The actors don’t get any say in how they think any given scenario would actually go down. Once everybody is all done up in hair and makeup, and fully geared up with a microphone wire attached to their butt, do you think they are allowed to stop the filming and say, “Wait a minute. This would never happen?” Nuh-uh. They are being paid to play out that writer’s fantasy. But that’s just what it is—fantasy. And it’s certainly fiction. If you think about most grand gestures you see in movies and ask yourself how you would really feel if a guy made one for you, you might realize, “That would not go well.” Here are movie grand gestures that are actually awkward in real life.
Trying to stop a wedding
When the guy gives that wedding-stopping speech in a movie, do you really think the bride hadn’t already thought about all of the issues he brings up? Of course, she has! And she decided to walk down the aisle anyways, even though her groom isn’t as adventurous and or good-humored as she wants him to be. The wedding-stopper would be escorted out by security, if not punched out by the groom’s friends.
Showing up at your home
In movies, it’s so romantic when a guy finds the address of a woman he just met in passing on the bus. She was always hoping he’d show up! In real life, even if you did think a guy from the bus was cute, if he tracked down your address and showed up, you’d decide he was scary and call the police. You’d be right in doing so.
A musical serenade
When a man serenades a woman in a public place in a movie, it seems like they are the only two people in the room. That’s because the cameras are only covering them. In real life, there are plenty of other people in the room, it’s embarrassing, and the guy’s voice is horrible. You also have no idea what to say when the song is over but, “Um…thank you? I need to eat this pasta before it gets cold now.”
Showing up at your work
Maybe the guy from the bus couldn’t figure out where you lived, but he figured out where you worked, and he showed up with a marching band or hot air balloon or some declaration of love. Now he’s not only scary, but he’s getting you in trouble for interrupting your coworkers.
Leaving his wife to be with you
Plenty of films and shows depict two coworkers or friends who you just know are in love but can’t be together because one of them is married. Easy—the guy just leaves his wife and professes his love to the other woman! In real life, rarely are romantic feelings mutually developed completely silently. If a guy who’d never so much as touched your hand left his wife for you, you’d probably say, “Um….I didn’t ask you to do that! I mean I think you’re cute but, like, that’s about it.”
Proposing at a concert
Proposing, asking to get you back, or asking you out—movie men have acted out all of these by stealing the microphone from the main act at a concert or assembly. Of course, the woman always says yes in that scenario. What if she said no, though? What if security is pretty pissed that some guy just interrupted a show people paid $120 in tickets and parking to see?
The radio announcement
Does anybody listen to the radio anymore? In real life, if a man professed his love over the radio to a woman, he’d probably have to call her after to make sure she heard it.
Standing outside all night
Movie men love to prove their love by standing outside all night, in the rain, not gaining shelter until the woman will take them back. In real life, you’d probably usher the poor guy in so that he didn’t catch pneumonia, but you’d say, “By the way…this doesn’t mean I’m taking you back. I just can’t be held responsible for your death.”
Showing up at your parent’s home
It always seems so bold and romantic when, in a movie, a man goes to a woman’s parents because he wants her back. Maybe he shows up at Christmas dinner, or privately calls the parents and asks if he can surprise their daughter next time she visits them. In real life, the parents would never say yes to that! They would say, “Well, our daughter is a grown woman so, if she broke up with you she probably had her reasons.”
Getting on the airplane with you
Nothing says, “I love you” than buying a pricey last-minute first class airplane ticket to try to get a woman back. That doesn’t mean she’ll love you back. She might say no, and you just went into debt for nothing, and you’re stuck on a six-hour flight with her (not to mention all of the other passengers who just witnessed your rejection).
Getting you back with a proposal
How does this work in movies? It’s so unreasonable—men getting a woman back who dumped them by proposing. Sometimes, it’s the man who left the woman and felt the only way to show that he knows he messed up is by proposing. In real life, if this happened to you, you would say, “Are you kidding me? You left me for a younger woman, like, two weeks ago? You obviously have no idea what you want, and are just afraid fo being alone now go away.”
Getting you back via your best friend
Some men go through the best friend instead of the family. In movies, somehow men who majorly mess up a relationship can get the woman’s best friend to sit down for a coffee. This best friend will be so moved by the man’s pain that she’ll tell him how to get her friend back. In real life, you know your friend would have your back and not take that coffee meeting in the first place.
Moving to be with you
Somehow, in movies, men can just pick up and move at a moment’s notice to be with a woman. In real life, said woman would probably say, “Okay well…this doesn’t mean we are getting married right now or even living together. You still need to find your own place. I hope you actually like this city because I’m not making any promises of a future with you.”
Quitting a job to be with you
This is a sub-category of moving to be with a woman. If a man quit his job in real life to run away with you, you’d probably say, “Please don’t do that. I’m not paying your rent.”
Writing a book about you
In movies, men can write books or articles about the women that they love, and get them published in major publications that that woman is sure to read. Do you have any idea how damn hard it is to get something published in even a tiny publication today? That woman would probably never know about the book that men poured his heart and soul into for years.