Hopefully, by the time you marry someone, you’ve been together so long, that not much changes at all once you get married. I was with my husband for seven years before we got married, and every time someone asks me, “So, how’s married life?” I say, “Basically the same. I just wear a ring now.” I mean, listen, I felt ready to marry my guy three years ago. And I think that’s how it should go. You should already basically feel like you’re married by the time you get married. Maybe, if it’s acceptable to you, you should live together for years before, too. Either way, you should have already wrapped your head around spending forever together, long before making it official. So, on that note, sex shouldn’t still be a huge deal by the time you get married. To be clear: sex is important and you should still be having it and enjoying it! But you should be way past the point of needing to do it like rabbits, and feeling like the relationship is all about sex. A lot of the changes to your sex life, from that first drought to the natural slow down, should have happened long before you get married. But even then, there will still be a few things you notice that are different after you tie the knot.
There’s a newlywed uptick
I didn’t expect our sex life to see any sort of surge after we got married, just because we’d been together so long. But there is kind of an excitement in the air after you make things official. It strengthens the flame for a minute – you’re feeling very lovey because you made this big commitment to each other, and you may have more sex for a bit.