How to Turn “Maybes” Into “Yes” in Relationships

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8) Maybe he’ll propose

Movies like “Wedding Wars” and “Leap Year” have shown the clever ways that woman manipulate a guy into putting a ring on it.  Unfortunately, many men feel that this is the rule and not the exception and that through some kind of evil trickery, he’ll end up at Tiffany’s putting a deposit on a princess cut that’s worth more than his car.  The problem is that many examples in media and society depict relationships as an obstacle course where a white dress, picket fence and “baby makes three” await at the finish line.  Many men have expressed to me personally that marriage is more about the woman than it is for the man, and this opinion is only solidified by bridezillas who destroy everything in their path taunting the war cry, “This is MY day!”

First, it is important to understand the difference between a wedding and a marriage.  If you’re only in it for the attention and flower arrangements, what you want is a beauty pageant, not a wedding.  While a wedding is one day, a marriage may be forever and it’s important that you know who you are spending forever with.  Next, understand how hard commitment can be for a man, let alone one that is recognized by the law.  The more pressure you place on a man to propose, the farther it can push him away.  Make it clear that good relationships are ones of progress and you won’t wait forever, but cherish what you have already.  Lastly, make sure you want to marry for the right reasons; just because all of your girlfriends are running down the aisle, doesn’t mean you should join the race.  Take a good hard look at yourself:  Why would you marry you?  Marriage should be the culmination of a stable relationship.  When you are confident in your love you can concentrate on more important things like trains and tiaras.

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