Controlling, Manipulative & A Crazy Beyotch: 7 Signs This Might Be You in Your Relationship…

June 20, 2012  |  
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Every woman gets a little emotional sometimes. We all do things we’re not proud of as a girlfriend sometimes, so don’t worry that you’re one of the crazy ones if you cry over nothing occasionally, get a little jealous or a little needy. That’s normal. What’s not normal is trying to manipulate, control or dominate your boyfriend. You should always fight for what you deserve, but not for more than that. Which is what you’re doing, if you do the following:

Intentionally making him jealous

If you want more attention from your man then you should either tell him he needs to step it up or you might need to have a talk with yourself. You could be ignoring the fact that you just might be insecure and so you unfairly make others fill your void of confidence by getting attention from other men. But someone else shouldn’t have to hurt because you’re hurting. Your man shouldn’t have to feel jealous because you feel insecure. If you need to work on your self-confidence, you need to do that work. You can’t make someone else feel like it is their fault because until you deal with said insecurity, he will never be able to provide you with all the attention you want.

Belittling his manhood

Never, ever, should you belittle the amount of money a man makes or how he is in bed: these are the two things he associates big time with his manhood. Again, if you’re unhappy about something in your relationship, you should aim to get what you want and do so with the least amount of damage. You should never aim to make your man feel small, just so that you can feel empowered. You should have a grownup conversation where you find out how you can fairly receive what you need and what part you play in all that.

Get mad about materialistic things

Wish your man bought you more gifts? Took you on more trips? Wore more expensive clothes? Well, guess what, he’s not just going to double his salary overnight. You knew who you were getting involved with when you gave him the time of day. But, more importantly, you do not understand what real love is if you can’t be happy without material objects. Even if a man DOES have money, he doesn’t owe you anything just because you’re sleeping with him…

Refusing to be wrong

Yes, it sucks to be wrong. It’s embarrassing. It’s painful. It’s humbling. However, you shouldn’t get mad at someone for pointing out when you are wrong. A man isn’t obliged to agree with you at all costs. It’s typical crazy b***h behavior to say, “Don’t you dare tell me I’m wrong!” if your boyfriend (God forbid!) disagrees with you. When you’re wrong, you should admit it and move on, not find a way to turn the tables on him or bring up old mess to have things go your way.

Publicizing your fights

If you’re in a fight with your boyfriend, he is only obliged to argue with you. He doesn’t need to argue with all of your Facebook and Twitter friends, and anyone who overheard you s*** talking him at the bar. A big sign of a crazy chick is someone who posts Facebook statuses telling everyone about why she is mad at her boyfriend. And as far as real conversations, you can certainly talk in confidentiality to your friends about your relationship issues if you want advice. But don’t start telling any and everyone who will listen one side of the story just so you can have people agree with you.

Staying mad for power

You’re mad? Fine. You’re mad yet your boyfriend has made every effort to right his wrong? What’s that about? Sounds like you’re just staying mad for power and you’re milking the fact that your man is groveling, buying you gifts, or doing all that is possible to make you happy again. At some point, if you forgive him and want to really move forward then you need to really get over whatever he did wrong and stop making him feel like crap. You wouldn’t want similar treatment if the tables were turned and you were adult enough to admit you were wrong, so don’t mistreat folks because you want to feel like you’ve got the upperhand and can milk him for all he has.

Making him responsible for your feelings

The overarching theme of all crazy b***h behavior is making no effort to pause and consider when something is your responsibility, and when it is your boyfriend’s. Sometimes you have to make the effort to keep your emotions under control, to apologize, to stay cool and to be rational. Your boyfriend doesn’t have to ride the waves of your moods, however you see fit. And you also shouldn’t expect him to read your mind either. As you are a grown woman and not a baby, express yourself, your hurt, your feelings, and let him respond how he sees fit, but expecting him to know what’s up with you at all times and being mad when he doesn’t understand is just straight up…crazy.

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