Practicing Forgiveness In A Marriage At The Hardest Times
- By
Julia Austin
Source: FatCamera / Getty
Where does it hurt?
When counseling couples through conflict, Dr. Louis asks the hurt party to identify triggers. In the same way a doctor might ask, “Where does it hurt?” Dr. Louis asks a patient to identify at what times the pain of the betrayal comes up. Perhaps their partner let them down in a big way during their birthday one year, and now, those painful emotions always come up during their birthday. Or, perhaps they let them down during the first pregnancy. Now the couple is pregnant with a second child, and those emotions are back. She says, “We really go to the space where it’s the most painful and that’s where we start the healing.”
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