The Love Of Your Life: What Actually Makes Love Last A Lifetime?

Wanting to be close, not right

The only reason you should be fighting is because you feel something has gotten in the way of you and your partner being close. Consider that for a moment: that is the stem of every fight. Your partner wants more boys night, he seems like he’s keeping a secret, you’re not having enough sex or he doesn’t spend enough time with your family. You get mad because you love this person and want to be as close as possible. And that’s why you should get mad. If you tend to resolve fights quickly, or if you’re both okay with saying sorry, even if you don’t accept fault, then you fight for the right reasons. But, if you hold grudges, remain angry for days or even weeks, you may not love this person as much as you thought because clearly being right, is more important to you than being close. When you’re with the right person, there’s a sort of glue there that keeps you from staying mad for long. When you’re with the wrong person, ego replaces that glue.