Check His Footwork: What His Shoes Say About Him

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Bare feet: We know these dudes, you see them in the neighborhood coffee shop or vegan hot spot, wearing healing crystals and beginning every sentence with “Peace.” They also like cargo like jeans with that special nonsensical hoop thing on the side (what is that for anyway?) and t-shirts with ironic sayings like Monsanto Food Fight and Women Are People Too. Bare feet guy is known widely for his poetic flare. But he does not write the angry Black Man stuff, like say a Black Ice, but rather his poetry is a little more sensitive and new agey. Bare feet guy doesn’t drink or smoke and loves talking about metaphysics. He also believes that the answer to racism is for everyone to mix all up so that we are all the same color. Oh and did I mention that bare feet guy is a complete man Slore? With a capital “Slore.” Think Eric Benet when he was with Halle Berry. Bare feet men are smooth, considerate and very caring about many things in this world. He is the type to listen very interestedly to your whining about your long day at work.  Heck, you might even get a neck massage and a cool poem out of it. But don’t expect him to only be giving out neck rubs and sonnets to just you. For bare feet guy, life is about freedom and expression, man, and women shouldn’t hold themselves to the archaic institutionalized system of oppression called relationships.

One caveat: Bare feet guy and sandal guy can be the same person. In fact they are known to frequent the same vegan hot spot.  The difference is that sandals guy will keep his damn shoes on when it is time to read his poem during open mic night.

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