15 Going On 30: Are Today’s Teens Rushing Into Adulthood? Why They Shouldn’t…

5. A Few Insanely Expensive Purchases

As I type this I am still geeked over the $200 Jeffrey Campbell hidden wedge sneakers I just purchased. Were they worth it? Probably not. Do I care? Absolutely not. When it comes to budgeting, being a wife and mother are filled with second guesses and buyer’s remorse that are often absent from the single life. At this point the only one paying for your over-spending is you. When your family grows but your income doesn’t, you have to be more conservative about your spending and sacrifice your own needs; if that means getting the thirty dollar pumps so your baby can have a warm winter coat, you have to do what you have to do. Indulge yourself while you still can.

6. Falling in Love With Your Line of Work

Unfortunately, many women are forced into jobs instead of choosing a career because they have mouths to feed and bills that need to be paid. There’s a freedom that comes with your typical twenties that allows you to really focus on your professional path and craft a career that involves doing what you truly enjoy. You remember the character Bernadine from Waiting to Exhale? She spent so much of her youth being a mother and wife that when it seemed to be slipping away, she had to revisit what once made her happy. You owe yourself a chance to chase your dreams before becoming burdened with the responsibilities of reality.

7. That Ability To Distinguish Your Friends from Your Frenemies

It’s harder to focus on making true friends when marriage and mommyhood come into play. If you’re fortunate enough to have a team of devoted divas, naturally you have less time to spend with your gal pal. When you settle down but still have single friends, relationships become strained. True friends will be there no matter if you’re shopping for shoes or school supplies. Hopefully you’ll know exactly who these people are before your half-a** homegirls run for cover when the wedding vows and baby formula start flying. Being a wife and mother can be challenging and it’s important to be able to find strength in your other support system.

8. A Look in the Mirror Where You Realize That Frankly, You’re the Ish

I see so many women try to use a relationship or pregnancy to give them the happiness and confidence they should already have. During your youth you’re crafting your individual style, personal choices and interests. If you’re lost, getting married and having a child won’t help you find yourself or your purpose, it will only leave you more bewildered. A husband or newborn baby shouldn’t have the task of helping you realize how great you are or can be. You should feel complete being exactly who you are while those relationships only enhance your fabulous-ness.

What did your twenties teach you about life?

Toya Sharee is a community health educator and parenting education coordinator who has a passion for helping young women build their self-esteem and make well-informed choices about their sexual health. She also advocates for women’s reproductive rights and blogs about everything from beauty to love and relationships. Follow her on Twitter @TheTrueTSharee or visit her blog Bullets and Blessings .

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