Elevate Your Kinky Nights With A Zenful State Of Mind.

How You Can Use Kink To Enjoy Mindful Sex

Portrait of a beautiful mixed race dominatrix woman

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You might have never connected kink to zen before, but when you pay close attention, it becomes clear that engaging in some good old-fashioned kink can lead to more mindful sex.

If your sex is more vanilla, it’s easier for things to become routine and to be rushed. Kink introduces an element of mindfulness because you don’t just rush to penetrative sex. Here are ways you can utilize kink to be more present for sex:

Utilize textures. Feeling and interacting with different textures has a way of pulling you into the present moment. Think tickling each other with feathers, teasing each other with leather tasseled whips, running a silk scarf across the skin, massaging each other with warm oils or dripping an ice cube over the body. The alternating sensations will keep your mind focused on your body.
Create your sex dungeon. Maybe you don’t have a real sex dungeon, but you can create the essence of one. When you think of a sex dungeon, all reminders of real life are removed. It’s enclosed. There aren’t any family photos or computers in there. The entire room and everything in it is focused on sex, leaving distractions at the door. Try to create an environment similar to this for your sex life.
Use blindfolds. When one sense is restricted, your body naturally focuses more on the others. That’s one way blindfolds can lead to more mindful sex. You’ll immediately pay more attention to what you’re feeling, hearing and tasting because your vision has been limited.
Try dom/sub play. If you’ve wanted an excuse to try dominatrix play, here’s your chance. During a dom/sub situation, one person is giving instructions and another is receiving them. When you’re engaged in either of these situations, you are solely focused on either coming up with the next instruction (and enjoying the results), or following the next instruction. It brings you fully into the present moment, rather than thinking about that work email.
Talk dirty and descriptively. Try this exercise: verbalize every single thing your partner is doing to you and how it feels. In doing so, you’re encouraged to pay attention to each sensation and fully experience it. It’s also hot for your partner to hear you explain how their movements feel.