Self-love is one of the strongest emotional weapons you can have. It fortifies your mind, gives you clarity when faced with disappointment, and, generally speaking, leads to better decision making.
But how do you do self-love? People throw the term around so casually as if it’s so easily done, or they treat it like this big, vague concept that lives up in the clouds. But self-love is not a mindset. Just like love towards another person is about actions more than just feelings, so, too, is self-love.
Life and love coach Francesca Hogi broke down what those actions are and removed some of the vagueness around loving one’s self. Here are what she calls the five pillars of self-love.
How self-love provides clarity
“Without self-love you’re going to be dealing with these extra complications that stand in the way of true intimacy and connection…. So when you’re triggered, depending on how you feel about your level of self-love, you handle that in a different way,” Hogi said. She went onto explain that without self-love moments when someone else disappoints you can be even more painful. You aren’t assessing the moment for what it is (not personal), but rather, the disappointment is triggering some negative belief you hold about yourself.