MadameNoire Featured Video

new year's resolutions 2020

Source: alvarez / Getty

How is your New Year’s resolution (or multiple resolutions) going right about now? My guess is that one may be going strong, while a few others may have dropped off. There are some places I absolutely avoid in the first couple of weeks of January knowing that they’ll be flooded with resolution-ers. Gyms. Pilates studios. Any coffee shop that hosts an open mic. Tax filing services (for those who resolve to get their taxes done early—they do it now, or lose steam, and do it late). But, I pretty much know that it’s safe to return to these places by February, because at that point, a lot of people have dropped their resolutions.


It’s a shame though, right? We make those resolutions with the best of intentions. The year closes, and we reflect on how we can be better people, so that we can be better spouses/friends/sisters/daughters/employees/bosses/neighbors. It’s all part of the bigger picture. If we’re better, society is better. That’s an admirable aspiration. So why is it so hard to stick to resolutions? Throughout the year, I’ll set little goals for myself—not relying on the New Year timeline—and I’ll meet them. But those resolutions can be so darn difficult.


It’s all about understanding our own psychology, habits, and motivation. That’s how we’ll actually stick to our resolutions. But beyond that, it’s about choosing the right resolutions. What’s right for your friend isn’t necessarily right for you, and that’s okay. You just need to be honest with yourself when choosing these resolutions, rather than let a personal trainer, financial advisor, stylist, friend, or anyone else pressure you into something. It’s okay to admit that we can’t do it all, or that we can’t do it all that fast. Here is why most New Year’s resolutions fail by February.


It’s not a true priority

Perhaps your resolution isn’t a true priority. I mean really. If you sit down and take stock of what’s happening in your life, what changes would actually improve your happiness every day? It’s funny how often we choose resolutions that won’t really change our day-to-day joy. Ultimately, as busy as we are, we will always prioritize activities and changes that we’ll actually feel the difference of on a regular basis. Thing like, “I’ll wash my car more” or “I’ll only buy organic” just don’t fall under that category.

Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN