Dating is, in and of itself, a skill. We all like to pretend that it’s an equal playing field and that, if you meet your match, sparks should fly and it should be obvious that there’s a connection there. But, for introverts, sparks don’t really fly. Small embers burn, very, very slowly, taking a long time to turn into a spark that then takes its sweet time going up in the air. But dating—true dating—doesn’t allow for that timeline. In today’s world of online dating and app swiping, people expect results, fast. If they don’t feel a connection there on the first date, they move on, because they know they can—there are thousands of other options on the apps. It’s hard out there for an introvert. It’s time somebody acknowledged that. Introverts weren’t built for the whole meeting at a trendy bar and trying to get to know each other in 90 minutes or less thing. If you’re a female introvert, then you know about these dating struggles.
You don’t shine on the phone
There’s a lot of communication before the actual date these days. People want to talk on the phone or Skype or FaceTime. Introverts aren’t great at that. Using technology brings in a sense of urgency—you need to keep the conversation moving and fun—which is something introverts can’t do in a hurry.