Even if you don’t have sex, simply having skin-to-skin contact is good for you
Your partner makes his efforts. You may not even know about them, but you’d notice if he stopped. That’s for sure. It could be little things. Staying on top of that five o’clock shadow. Doing push-ups. Paying attention to the fit of his clothes. If he just stopped all of that one day, you’d be disappointed. It’s okay to admit that. It doesn’t make you superficial—it makes you human.
“Well maybe we should just breakup, then!” “Maybe you should just leave me for what’s her name from your office.” “Maybe this isn’t meant to be!” “Maybe I should just pack up and leave!” Ah yes, the old breakup bluff. You don’t mean it. But you say it when you feel backed into a corner, and when your partner is calling you on some stuff that is true.
Stop asking yourself, back and forth, if you should bring a jacket. Bring it. You know you’ll want it. When you don’t bring one, you complain that you’re cold all night and he has to hear about it.
Something else that the types of men who make fun of women for “letting themselves go” don’t understand because they’ve likely never experienced it is this: when a man really loves a woman, he sees her inner beauty more and more every day. It creates a glow over her that he sees all of the time, regardless of how she actually looks.
Remember when you used to wrap these in toilet paper, and then put that in a shoe box, and then put that shoe box in a dumpster in the next town? Yeah. Now you just let them balance on the top of the overly full bathroom trash bin. Exposed. Unwrapped.
I do notice people giving my poor boyfriend side eye. Though this is the 21st century, a lot of people still think it’s entirely up to the man to propose, and that my boyfriend is forcing me into some non-married purgatory. I’m perfectly capable of proposing to him if I want to. But, I don’t want a wedding right now.
Ask your partner on a proper date. I know, I know—he’s already your man. But everybody likes to be wined and dined. Leave a little note on his desk, formally inviting him to have dinner with you at a certain time and place. Let him know what the wardrobe will be and when to be ready
Being a bride-to-be and dealing with in-laws is stressful when you’ve only known said in-laws for a couple of years. Creating boundaries with them feels very delicate. Meanwhile, when you’ve been with your man for a decade, you’re part of his family now. You can talk to his parents as if they are your own.
Just remember that some health issues—like those related to reproductive health or gastrointestinal problems—are sensitive. Your partner would probably prefer you don’t go into detail about his colonoscopy.
How do long-term couples make it work? Here are 14 top secret pro tips.
If you had a bad day, sex is simply not happening. And you can almost only exclusively have sex after a solid eight hours of sleep