There are a handful of things that will get a man the death glare from his partner, and that’s when he insists that she’s only saying, thinking or feeling something because she’s on her period. And it’s well-deserved, too–it’s never up to anybody else to tell us why we’re feeling a certain way. But, if we’re honest, just between us menstruaters, we really can’t trust the things we say, think and feel when we’re on our periods. Our hormones change so much that they affect the way our brains work. Some of the neurotransmitters that usually help us combat feelings of depression or anxiety stop firing. Some of the chemicals that tell us it’s time to mate right now go into overdrive, and we end up hornier than we ever knew possible (bad timing, of course). The good news is that that roller coaster of a time is only temporary; the bad news is that some of the decisions we make and actions we take during that week or two can have long-term consequences. That’s why these are thoughts every woman should ignore when she’s on her period.
I should quit my job
Any amount of stress is too much stress when you’re on your period. So if your boss so much as asks you to make one change to a document, you may tell yourself that you cannot survive the stress of this job!
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Why you should ignore the thought
On any other day, your job wouldn’t seem that bad. Your hormones are making you extremely lethargic, so every task feels enormous, and the happy chemicals in your brain aren’t helping you out as much as they usually would.
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I should go volunteer at an orphanage
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Your maternal, nurturing instincts are on overload right now. So much so that you might think the fact that you have a job and a life is selfish! You think you should sacrifice your life to living and volunteering at an orphanage.
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Why you should ignore the thought
If you did leave your life behind to dedicate yourself to some charitable pursuit, you’d pretty quickly miss your friends, your happy hours, your income…This is not a decision to make on a whim.
Why hasn’t he proposed yet?!
Whatever little relationship thing your friends and family always bring up–whether it’s why you don’t live with your boo yet or why you’re not married yet–while start to overpower your thoughts on your period. You never cared before when you got married, now you want to choke your boo with a cumber bun!
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Why you should ignore the thought
Right now, centuries of hormonal programming are telling you to latch onto your partner, and reserve his resources all to yourself. That programming is using the little things your friends say against you right now. Don’t listen.
I should just get fat
You feel bloated. You look bloated. And you haven’t even touched that ice cream cake in the freezer that you’ve been dreaming about yet. So, it’s easy to think, “I’ll never be trim again I should just eat everything and get fat!!!”
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Why you should ignore that thought
This is another result of centuries-old hormonal programming. Your body wants to hoard calories for the baby it thinks it’s going to make! But you will look trim again in three to five days. Or you won’t…if you eat everything in the house.
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I should join an all-women’s commune
It’s pretty common to, well, hate men when you’re on your period. You just look at them and think, “We do this so that you can be alive! And you know what? I’m not sure you deserve it.” Then you want to move to an all-women’s commune.
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Why you should ignore the thought
You know plenty of good, caring, sensitive men out there who would cater to your every need on your period if you asked them. There might be a few insensitive ones who still make PMS jokes, but the mistakes of a few shouldn’t land on the masses. And you know your boyfriend’s cuddles help you feel better on your period.
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My boyfriend should buy my tampons
Yeah. And my pads. And all the food I want on my period. And he should have to do my job when I’m on my period. If he likes to have fun with my vagina so much, then he should have to pay for its upkeep!
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Why you should ignore the thought
Well, you have a point with the whole him enjoying your vagina thing. But you enjoy his penis, and you don’t endure prostate exams for him. Don’t kill the romance by sending him on a bulk-tampon-buying-trip to Costco.
Everything is personal. Everything is a dig.
If your boyfriend is so much as 12 minutes late for the very nice dinner you made him, you start to believe this relationship isn’t important to him. If your best friend goes on a trip with another friend without you, you believe she has secretly hated you all along.
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Why you should ignore the thought
There’s, unfortunately, little scientific reasoning behind this. But just know that all women feel this way on their periods, and then almost zero women feel this way when they period’s over. So these are probably thoughts that aren’t worth entertaining.
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My partner should have to have sex with me
You might start to think it’s pretty unfair that your partner won’t have sex with you when you’re at your horniest. And, you might think he’s a total butthole for being afraid of a little blood. This might lead you to yell at him. A lot.
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Why you should ignore the thought
If you somehow talk your partner into sleeping with you right now, you’re going to end up feeling pretty guilty. He’s going to end up mortified. And this incident will follow you long after the period.
