7 Ridiculous Celebrity Rumors People Actually Believe

March 26, 2012  |  
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I’ve said it before and I’ll probably say it again: We are celebrity obsessed. The 24-hour news cycle, the websites and blogs thirsty for traffic (this one included) and the paparazzi make it more than possible for us to know more about celebrities than we ever would in the past. And when you think about the shift we’ve undergone, it really isn’t very healthy. Instead of debating world issues like the downward spiraling global economy we’d rather discuss the plausibility of a Crihanna reunion. Now, I’m not judging because I have to force myself to click on politically based stories but I’ll click on a post about Beyonce and Blue Ivy without question. Sometimes I have to give myself a side eye. But I digress. As human beings we love to talk and gossip, hip our friends to the latest news, especially if it’s scandalous. And this increased “access” (really invasion of privacy) when it comes to celebs  breeds an environment that is very conducive to shyte starting. Check out some of the more outrageous rumors originated and perpetuated by the media.

Johnny Gill & Eddie Murphy Relationship 

It’s a shame two black men can’t be close, friendly without people making assumptions about their sexuality. Really, you’ve never heard anyone say anything about Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. But Eddie Murphy and Johnny Gill, who’ve been friends for over 2 decades, have got to be sleeping with each. They’re seen having lunch together, leaving each others’ homes etc so it must be something more. I mean, Lil Wayne was photographed kissing Baby in the mouth and people didn’t make as many assertions about their sexuality as they’ve made about Johnny Gill and Eddie Murphy’s. I just never understood most gay rumors. Unless there is significant proof  that someone is in fact a homosexual (i.e. a woman caressing your arse on vacation), then there’s really no reason to assume otherwise. And even then you’ve got to be careful.

Beyonce’s Fake Pregnancy

To hear some people talk, you would swear they were Bey’s gynecologist. Everybody knows what’s going on with her uterus. Anytime her name comes up, there will be at least 50-11 people ready to jump up and shout that she didn’t give birth to her daughter naturally. I’m not under the assumption that everything Beyonce’s PR team releases is honest-to-God truth but I’m inclined to believe she gave birth to this child. Belly aside,  Beyonce’s  face and boobs went through significant changes during her pregnancy. She had that widened pregnant girl nose and I, being the boob lover that I am, noticed she was a little more stacked than usual. It’s funny that the same people claiming that she needed to sit down somewhere and have a baby were the very ones claiming she was faking her pregnancy. Smh. The fact that Beyonce dropped her baby weight with a quickness did NOT help the situation in the slightest. The rumor mill was refueled after the singer reemerged after a month of seclusion, looking svelte. I won’t even go into explaining what genes, minimal weight gain, a healthy lifestyle, a personal trainer and a dietitian can do for you. People will believe what they will. But I will say I have no choice but to believe some of this is a little hateration. After all, when Heidi Klum pops up on the red carpet, wearing her model clothes, after giving birth to baby number 86, no one makes any type of accusations about where the child came from.


Full disclosure: I just finished reading Jay-Z’ Decoded so I can say that I’m a little partial to him right now.  Now that that’s out of the way, can we please let the illuminati rumors die? Half of us don’t even know what it means to be a part of such an organization and there’s no way to prove you are or are not a part of it. If someone tells me they don’t worship the devil that’s about all they can do. And that’s what Jay-Z’ claimed on several occasions.  I don’t expect him to travel to churches throughout the nation, faking holy ghost dances to prove a point. Plus, since I just finished reading his book, which is basically a compilation and explanation of the meanings behind his lyrics, I can say that the man references God more than a little bit. A writer once referenced the fact that when a black person achieves a certain level of success in this country, other black people begin assuming they had to “sell their soul” to get it. Please don’t let that crab in the barrel be you.

Ciara’s a Hermaphrodite 

This is so laughable, there’s really nothing much to say. Even if Ciara was born with a penis, what does it matter? Were you trying to sleep with her? And further more, would her wang have stopped you from doing the 1-2 step? No? Oh, ok then carry on.

Matthew Knowles is Kelly Rowland’s Biological Father 

Of all the rumors on this list, this one is probably the most plausible. Both Kelly and Matthew are a beautiful brown color, she lived with the Knowles family for a bit, Matthew has been known to stray and Kelly acknowledged the fact that she didn’t have a relationship with her father growing up. That’s a lot of evidence. But last year Kelly Rowland publicly announced that she’d be reuniting with her alcoholic father after 20 years. If you were going to lie about your daddy, this is not you would willingly tell.

Oprah and Gayle and more than just friends…

Another gay couple. I don’t know anyone who personally believed such accusations but I do know these rumors circulated for quite a bit. It wasn’t until Oprah told Barbara Walters, once again, that’s not how she gets down. She told Walters why she was so affected by this rumor in her interview with the veteran journalist last year:

“And the reason why [the rumor] irritates me is because it means that somebody must think I’m lying. That’s number one. Number two … why would you want to hide it? That is not the way I run my life.”

That’s the truth, what don’t we know about Lady O? She’s an open book.

Lil Kim’s Semen Regurgitation

So, rumor has it that during one of her shows, Lil Kim starts hurling. But it ends in a couple of different ways, 1.) people examined the contents of her barf to find that it contained a quart of man gravy–highly unlikely or 2.) that she was rushed to the hospital where doctors pumped her stomach to find she’d ingested too much semen. This rumor is so epic it’s basically become an urban legend. (I know I believed it.) The rumor is so legendary, it was applied to a host of other celebrities like Rod Stewart, Elton John, David Bowie, Mick Jagger, Jon Bon Jovi, Alanis Morissette and Britney Spears. A rumor indeed. Most stomachs can’t hold that much liquid and as some of us know, semen isn’t exactly vomit inducing.

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