Since the weekend, you’ve likely heard about social media relationship guru Derrick Jaxn’s whole persona crashing down after a woman went public claiming she had an affair with him. Jaxn addressed the claims by revealing he “completely failed” in his marriage and did indeed cheat on his wife Da’Naia.
“The truth is, and I’m saying it here now, is that Derrick Jaxn was involved with other women outside the marriage,” he said. He added that his behavior was “definitely not in alignment with the vows that I took and definitely not in alignment with the Biblical standard of what it means to be faithful, which is the standard that I’m going by now.”
And while there was much to be said about Jaxn living a life counter to the messages he sends as a “relationship expert” who used his platform to give advice to others, namely, women, somehow, his wife has become the center of attention and lightning rod for criticism.
Plenty of people took to social media, including well-known figures, to address her body language and to say that she looked forced to hold his hand and sit in for the video, especially because she did all of that with a bonnet on. It seems criticism continued though, and it was aimed at Da’Naia for agreeing to do the video and standing by him. Some assumed she was being held against her will. It became so much that Derrick put up a post in his InstaStories on Wednesday morning saying the following:
“Slander me. Not her,” and adding as a caption, “Just me, please.”
If people paid attention though, she didn’t just sit through the whole video without speaking or agreeing with everything that he said. When she had her moment to speak, Da’Naia said immediately that she left the marriage and didn’t return until he’d done the work to be a better husband.
“I’ve been flooded again with messages and these things about I need to leave or why haven’t I left? And the answer is, when I found out about it I left. I did not hesitate or waste time to do so,” she said. “I stayed gone no matter how many times he came and stood firm on ‘I am not coming back.’ And I did not come back until I seen a shift and a change in his mentality and how he carried himself and how he presented himself in conversations that we were able to have that we had never been able to have in just 12 years of knowing each other.”
And for the record, per their IG video, they’ve moved on and have continued to seek counseling, relying on their faith and for Derrick, getting guidance from men of God.
“That is what I needed for the continuation of me being present in this marriage and to stand by his side,” she said. “So today, where I’m at is at peace. I stand by his side and have no hesitation, I have no hurt, no shame about that. It’s only because of the grace of God and the mercy of God.”
“I forgave him and most importantly, God has first forgiven him and I also forgive the others as well,” she added. “With that we are free and moving forward.”
It’s odd that Da’Naia is getting an earful based on her husband’s mistakes, and for deciding to stay after she felt he was committed to changing. Where the issue lies exactly, we’re not sure. We’re betting our money it’s all about the bonnet and the lack of a desire to get gussied up for a video like that. *shrugs*
We will say though, Derrick doesn’t seem to be helping the situation:
Da’Naia, for the record, seems unbothered and focused on using her platform to spread God’s word, not to appear in a way that would please others: