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Some people are having a really hard time seeing Ciara happy. Or better yet, they’re having a hard time comprehending how she could be happy with a man like Russell Wilson when she was almost married to rapper Future.

Houston-based rapper Slim Thug is one of those people. The 37-year-old, known for songs like “Still Tippin'” and for saying “Black women have to bow down and let it be known that they gotta start working hard” to get a successful Black man, spoke on the idea of a woman moving from a trash street guy to a clean-cut good guy. He doesn’t believe the relationship with the latter would be sincere, and used Ciara and Russell’s relationship as an example.

“Russell Wilson…do a woman who used to talk to Future really want a Russell Wilson?” he asked while speaking on Houston radio station 97.9 this week. “That’s a good question. Like, I don’t believe it. I think it’s all financial stability. I don’t think that after you like a dude who cool…Homeboy is just — not hating. I bought his shoes the other day…I have no personal issue with him or her, God bless ’em. He’s just a corny dude. Ain’t nothing wrong with it. It’s his whole movement. I’m not going to say ‘corny’ ’cause that’s hating. He’s just like a square.”

After sputtering over the reasons Russell isn’t post-street dude worthy, the rapper said he just can’t see how a woman like Ciara could be comfortable making such a drastic change romantically.

“I don’t believe a girl who come from a street dude could even adapt to that,” he said. “I ain’t gone say she’s a goldigger because she got her own. But at the end of the day, I don’t believe it’s real.”

After receiving major backlash for his statements, in just a span of hours, he issued an apology — only to Russell, though. He also tried to provide some clarification of his original comments.

“First of all, I want to apologize to Russell Wilson for saying that he’s lame and corny. Really I ain’t mean that,” he said. “I was trying to say good guy vs. bad guy swag, but they made a clip — you know how the Internet do. They’re going to cut out and make you sound crazy for clicks and sh-t. But the question of it, I shouldn’t even have used them as an example, but it was the only example I knew. So the question I had was, can a woman who’s attracted to a bad boy, let’s just say bad boy, can she switch it to a clean-cut guy? I believe if you like a street dude, you like street dudes. I think a woman would do that for financial stability and for the better of her kids or a better side of life as she grow older, but I don’t think that’s initially in her heart or who she really feel like she want to be with. I could be wrong. I’m a rapper. What you think?”

Well Slim, I think it wouldn’t seem plausible to you that a woman could change and want better, because guys like you don’t see the benefit or point in trying to change for the better. For example, years have passed and you’re still talking crazy.

It’s always a shock to men that women could want to grow and be with someone who treats them well because they usually haven’t been subject to the type of behavior they inflict upon women in relationships, situationships and the like. When people don’t realize the ways in which they operate hurts others, or don’t care to see it because they’re comfortable in their dysfunction, they only think in terms of ego. “How do you leave a guy like me for a dude like that?” In Ciara’s case, it was easy. Future, who she rode for unflinchingly during their relationship, supporting his music, publicly calling “My King” and trying to be friends with his baby’s mothers, paid her back by allegedly cheating on her. And when she ended their engagement and decided to step away from so-called bad boys like him, he spoke poorly of her publicly, and hasn’t been the best parent to their child, according to proof of missed visitation dates she took to court.

In replacement of that stress and anguish, she got Russell. A man who is serious about his faith (to the point that he encouraged them to wait until marriage to have sex), who loves to give back, particularly to children, who took on fatherly duties for her son, Future, and goes out of his way to publicly laud Ciara.

Hmmm. A man who calls you a “b—ch” on Twitter or a man who calls you “My forever“? Oh, please. That isn’t even a contest.

Ciara stopped running behind men who weren’t serious about themselves, let alone her, put herself first, prayed over her situation, and in the end, was given something much better than Future or any other “street dude” could give her: peace of mind. She outgrew them, and it was clearly the best decision she could make.

It’s pretty much the same way LeToya Luckett outgrew Slim, another example I guess he forgot about…

He may not want to speak on it now, but these two were together off and on for 10 years. When we interviewed her a few years ago, she admitted that while it was hard to move forward from what they had, their relationship (as lovers and friends) went as far as it needed to. Sis was no longer “Torn.”

“…that was a very very long time,” she said. “When you have somebody you were friends with for such a long time, it’s hard to let go of the friendship. And you get used to it, and comfortable with one person. We’re still cool. I see him– ‘Hey, what’s up what’s good?’ But I think we’ve both kind of outgrown each other…”

And that’s what it’s all about. Growth. What you wanted 10 years ago is probably not what you want or need now. Forget the money, Ciara needed someone who would truly love her, who could be there for her son and help her continue to grow as a person. She found that. So if you ask me, the Wilson union is as “real” as it gets.

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