Gettyimages.com/Portrait of confused African American young woman shrugging against white background
I learned a long time ago not to judge people with sexually transmitted diseases. I don’t know their stories. In fact, many of my close friends who are usually very careful in sexual encounters have contracted STDs. And honestly, I have some friends who are notoriously not careful and yet, by some miracle, they have not contracted anything. I’m glad they haven’t, but they also don’t necessarily deserve the reputation as some nun or super-cautious person because, well, they haven’t been—they just got lucky. When I was younger, I made a few mistakes that I’m very fortunate didn’t result in an STD. So, when my partner of five years now told me—on our third date, before we’d had sex—that he had an STD, I didn’t knock any points off of his score. It was a bummer, sure, but I didn’t let that fact affect my judgment of his character. I wish I could say the same for some other people in my life. Here are insulting things people say when your partner has an STD.
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When did you find out?
In other words, “He must have told you when you were already super invested in the relationship and too attached to leave.” In other words, “So he roped you in, and then he told you.”
