8 Dynamics That Should Never Exist In A Relationship

January 12th, 2012 - By Julia Austin

"Couple yelling"

“I’m sure other couples do this.” That’s what goes through a lot of men and women’s heads when there is a dynamic in their relationship that they sometimes wonder, “Is this bad?” when they already know the answer to the question. But when you don’t want to be out on the singles scene again, you would be surprised what people will allow themselves to deal with in a relationship. You can tell yourself, “this is normal, but there are some things that should never be justified: like the following.

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  • Crake

    The pictures and ads on this site are hilariously tacky. 

  • Tjscott87

    This is such a ridiculous article. From a mans perspective, I’m not staying in a relationship if it doesn’t involve sex. Sorry, but you’re delusional if you think it doesn’t matter. You want me to do all this baby boo-boo BS and then you get frigid and don’t put out? We’re done.

  • guest

    Give me a break,  I have been with the same man for 40 years and all of the things on your list (except for the royal mentality) have happened.  And they have happened more than once.  I am married to a great man, but when you spend so many years with the same person these things will happen.  What is wrong with people now days is that they think everything will always be rosy.   This list is why so many people are divorced.  Except for any kind of abuse, you should put on your big girl pants and work it out.

  • billybear3

    And when she holds out on sex for 2 years at a time should you just accept that? ( She wasn’t tired because she didn’t work,  I took care of the kids needs like practice, meetings, mall trips etc.) Not me after my kids were 18 I divorced her. Her sisters and 2 marriage counselors warned her I would leave. And that fools still wants to get back together and hasn’t grasped that on top of other issue not sleeping with your spouse will lead to an end of the relationship. When you dated you had sex all the time, when you marry the expectations are the same if you can’t put out in a marriage GET OUT…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Mike-Gieser/100002432277953 Mike Gieser

     The one who wants less is being selfish”.  BALONEY.  First of all, the one who stays in the relationship even tho they are unsatisfied with it is a true hypocrite.  Some people just love to complain and try to degrade the other person by claiming that they aren’t doing enough for the relationship.  They’re gutless, and would rather entertain ideas about the greener grass elsewhere, they stay in the relationship they “claim” isn’t what they want, but in all probability, they are actually less apt to commit than the other person who at least knows what they want at this place in time.  The uncommitted one is actually very committed to being true to oneself.  The one who wants more is probably incapable of a deeper relationship, so staying in the present one is a perfect arrangement for them.

  • knowwhatittakes

    Good article and there is a white guy in at least two pictures by the way.  The key to a great relationship is respect and kindness and this includes self respect.  If your waitstaff is absent you or your SO either flags another or gets up and goes to the bar, register, entry and asks for help from one of them.  There is NEVER any excuse for rudeness but being assertive and firm are required any time another person is disrespectful or rude.  Regarding sex – if either partner is not in the mood – DEAL WITH IT.  Do you really want to have sex with some who doesn’t want it just as much as you do?  YUKK.  If you insist when your partner is not interested, at least you better at least leave a nice tip because that’s what you’re expecting – sex in return for pay, staying faithful and married or monogamous, not because the person finds you so attractive they can’t keep their hands off your. And if you can’t deal with it, don’t get married or claim to be in a monogamous relationship.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/4B42SP7UOPFPBGJB4DJJYEMN4M Caer Cariad

    How about things that ARE common, but shouldn’t be, like women manipulating men?  To women, relationships are a game of manipulation.  It’s all about how much service she can get out of her man at the cost of the least amount of sex.  Women like to think they are the “honest” ones in a relationship, but they aren’t.  Relationship “issues” and drama are all just misdirection and manipulation for getting more attention or absolving women from responsibility.  Here’s another clue for women: you think we don’t know that you are manipulating us, but we do.  You really aren’t as clever as you think.  And when we break up with you, all that manipulation we’ve been through is the reason, but we know damn well you’ll never own up to it, so that’s why we don’t give you the real reason.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=552452789 Erin Hunter

    I hate these articles that have one paragraph per page and you have to keep clicking an arrow to get to the next page, wait for that page to pop up, etc. Just put all eight paragraphs and pictures on one page that I can scroll down and read! It shouldn’t take me that long to read 1 simple article. So annoying. I don’t see the point of these photo slide show articles. This format doesn’t seem to be innovative at all. If you have a useful message for readers, make it easy for the readers to get.

    (Pretty good article too.)

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Tonya-Pralat/1075692739 Tonya Pralat

    Its a website for black women thats why.

  • slayerwulfe

    Is he cheating on you (girl) Who would a guy be cheating with? girls are the cheaters because it’s normal for them to. Girls have an obligation to the unborn life in them to do better, it’s not cheating it’s life. The loser guy beats the female because he can’t beat the dominant male.

  • dawg

    I see all African American coupled pictured here.  Where is the diversity in representing richly different relationships?  Where are the Asian men with black women, Native American women with black men, etc.?  And why privilege straight couples?  Madame Noire badly needs some diversity to show tolerance and respect for people who are different.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001298628518 Tony River

    This article is biased and dumb.  Things are not and never will be equal
    between the sexes. This article if from a females point of view, the “Sometimes
    you say you’re not in the mood and your boyfriend” part gives it all
    away.  The avg man craves sex way more
    than the avg female it’s a genetic thing. 

     

    As long as females continue to talk about “and he’s got
    a good job” and other stupid s**t like that women will continue to be
    money hungry people who use sex appeal to be lazy, to get an edge at the office
    and manipulate men all there lives.

     

    If your man wants sex he should get it. And if you disagree,
    stop using your sex appeal to get better jobs, have doors open for you,
    control social groups, stay a home raising your kids while your guys is out
    working hard, not kill the spider, and soo much more…. because if you don’t
    YOUR A DAMN HYPOCRITE and just because the nerdy beta males take your side
    publicly, don’t mean most desirable men don’t secretly agree with this.

     

    Oh, and just so you know. I came across this article because
    some girl posted in on her profile. This super hottie (5’9, long brown hair,
    white, super skinny/petite) who I picked up at a bar in Belmont Shore Long
    Beach a year ago, and have been having a secret relationship with this whole
    time while her hubby is out supporting her lazy a** and their baby. All while
    she saves me for later in case her marriage don’t work out.  If she ever dumps him for me, and it looks
    likely recently, I will expect her s@xy yet lazy a** to do me anytime I desire
    it or else she can pay her own damn bills.

  • Abuabraham2

    the article says:  “Never should someone resent you or attempt to make you insecure in order
    for you to sleep with them. That BS happens enough at single bars as it
    is. It should not be happening in a healthy relationship.”

    but…what if the person never wants to sleep with you?  what if you used to have sex all the time, but now she doesn’t anymore?  how can a man just sit there silently and suffer through that, when he himself wants to have sex?  does his feelings or desires not count for anything?  How can you NOT resent someone for not sleeping with you anymore?

  • Toncuz68

    The first one makes sense…if a guy doesn’t respect people, he will not respect you. Too many psychotic women date thugs and “bodyguards” that she thinks she can bully other people with who end up beating the crap out of HER. I have zero sympathy for women like that.

  • Awful

    This is the stupidest article I’ve read in a while. Really? Effective communication is important? Well, how about that. You should refund the money you got from me clicking on this s**t.