Do “The Rules” on Dating Still Apply? Yes — They Worked For Me

November 2, 2011  |  

by Quierra Davis-Martin

For many years women have wondered if there was a right or wrong way to date. Every woman has had the horror story of going on a fabulous date with a guy they were immensely attracted to only to not hear back from him for a second date. We wonder, what went wrong? Was it something I said or did that turned my date off? The dating scene can be hard and brutal if you’re not aware of what’s appropriate to say and do when first meeting a guy.

The Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right by Elle Fein and Sherrie Schneider is a controversial self-help book originally published in 1995, which guided women on how to date, how to be a “creature unlike any other” and provided advice on what to do and not do during courtship. The Rules include:

1. Don’t open up too fast/ be honest but mysterious.

2. Don’t meet him half way or go on a Dutch date.

3. Love only those who love you.

4. Don’t talk to a man first and don’t call him first. If he doesn’t call he’s not that interested.

5. Don’t go overboard and other rules for “giving” to men and paying for things.

6. Don’t see him more than once or twice a week.

7. Don’t rush into sex and other rules for intimacy.

8. Don’t be a groupie and other rules for dating high profile celebrity men.

9. Don’t live with a man (or leave your things at his apartment).

10. Let him take the lead.

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