Social Media Has Ruined Dating Forever

October 9, 2017  |  

Indoor shot of smiling black young man surfing internet on mobile phone messaging friends online and checking newsfeed via social media while relaxing at home lying on couch with hands behind head

Back in elementary school our teachers often talked about how technology and computers would change the world for the better. Manual labor jobs became easier and banking is more convenient than ever now that you can deposit a paycheck by snapping a pic from a cell phone. Unfortunately, no one sent us the memo about how the internet would screw up the process of finding love. And in case you missed it too, we came up with a few reasons it’s better to go offline when it comes to finding Mr Right.

  • Too much familiarity too soon. Between Google, LinkedIn,  Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest you can know a man’s employment history, favorite TV shows, and which one of his cousins is in jail without having any communication with him! Knowing so many trivial things about a guy leads some women  to serious relationships sooner than they should because social media information has provided a false sense of familiarity. And when things become familiar too fast, they get boring.
  • You become critical of every single post. Here’s the deal, being Facebook friends with a guy you’re dating or wanting to date is a gift and a curse. It allows you to see what he considers is important information to share with others–be it good, bad, or ratchet. But we start analyzing the content a guy posts and judging him to the point of no return, whether we really want to or not. A status that disagrees with Colin taking a knee can get you dismissed real quick around here (as it should). Too many cases of incorrect spelling and run-on sentences also makes us think you have the intellectual ability of wilted lettuce.
  • It turns you into Nancy Drew. Picture this. It’s Friday afternoon and you can’t wait to get off from work and do something with bae. So you get dolled up and invite him over for a homecooked meal set for 8 o’clock sharp. 8:15 rolls around and he hasn’t appeared or called to say he’s running late. 10 times out of 10, your next move is stalking his social media accounts to see what the hell is up. You’re looking at his last social media activity trying to see what it implies, what chick “liked” it, and if it has the slightest thing to do with him being late to dinner. Once you do that, you’re next move is to call him. Social media was your first choice because it may have provided incriminating evidence that you could badger him with on the courtesy phone call. How do we know? Been there, done that.
  • It makes you think the grass is greener on the other side.  Social media puts too many hot items on your plate at once. That’s why you have to look for qualities of substance when getting to know someone, and that comes with wisdom and maturity. No matter how disciplined you think you are, it’s easy to get caught up. Suddenly, you’ve stopped paying attention to the man you’re with because Beard Game Matters is in heavy rotation on Facebook.
  • It can decrease real-life interaction. This is probably what sucks about social media the most. Just because a guy can click on your profile and see how your day went, he should still call you on the phone to hear your voice reiterate how that day went. We can’t stress how aggravated we are with guys who ask us to send them body pics. If we wanted to show you what we’re working with, it’d happen in real life. And the fact that a guy has to beg us for a view means his chances of seeing what our mama gave us are slim to none.
  • It can make you insecure, if you let it.  Instagram girls can be your body goals, just don’t let them consume you. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be satisfied with your outer appearance, but make sure you’re in the gym for you and your health, not because you’re trying to compete with the women he’s known to lust for (which says an awful lot about him).
  • Everybody ain’t what they “post” to be.  We love the saying follow your heart but take your brain with you! Know that what you see isn’t always what you get. Sure, he shouted out his kids for making terrific grades this quarter. But ask yourself this: How instrumental is he in their academic success? Is he helping them with studying and science projects on the weekend? Or does his ex-wife have to do all the work because he’s too busy playing Xbox and going on road trips the days he’s supposed to have the kids. People don’t post all their business, just the things they want you to know. Perception and reality are worlds apart.

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