Too Much Or Just Right? Mother Pops Up On Her Daughter’s College Campus When She Doesn’t Hear From Her For 3 Days

August 30, 2017  |  

Wait by the phone

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I’ll never forget the day a police officer banged on the door to my college apartment in the threatening and intimidating way only police can. It was about 3 a.m. The time for visitors had long since expired. I opened the door, shook, searching my mind wondering what I’d done wrong…or what they thought I’d done wrong. Police don’t always need a reason.

When I opened the door, the officer asked “Are you Veronica?” When I said yes, he, clearly irritated, told me to call my parents. I’d had a meeting earlier that day and left my phone on silent. And from the time the meeting was over, around 7 p.m., to the time the cop showed up at my door at 3 a.m., my parents, who were six hours and several states away from me, had tried to reach both me and my roommate several times.

From then on out, that was my mother’s threat to me. “Don’t make me call the cops.”

So I can certainly understand where Nicole Walters was coming from when she popped up on her daughter’s campus when she hadn’t heard from her in three days. Now, y’all know school just started but already Walters’ daughter has forgotten the people who got her here. In her defense though, after the third day, she texted her mother at 2 a.m., saying she was alright.

But by that time it was too late. Shortly after that Walters and her huband rolled up on campus, which is only 25 minutes away from their home.

See how it went down.

For the first half of the video I was with Walters completely. I mean, three days is way too much time to be unresponsive. When you know your parents are only 25 minutes away, it would be in your best interest to do everything in your power to keep them off the campus. And honestly, it’s better if Walters’ daughter learn that lesson sooner than later.

Where she lost me though was when she posted flyers around the school. The flyers contained a picture of Walters’ daughter with the question, “Is my daughter being irresponsible?” The flyer instructs students to reach out to her, Walters, if her daughter is misbehaving in some way. The incentive to get them to snitch is free pizza, a college student’s kryptonite.

The flyers are what I had a problem with, because one of the best and most necessary parts of the college experience is learning to successfully navigate adulthood when no one is leaning over your shoulder, micromanaging you. The point is to figure it out yourself, without the help of the parents who dictated your life for the first 17-18 years. Not only is it embarrassing to have your face plastered all over the dorm, I don’t see how it really helps in the goal of becoming a productive citizen. Have you really grown and matured if you’re only behaving responsibly so won’t get in trouble with your mom? I’d argue no.

Still, all of this comes from someone who hasn’t raised children, who has no concept of the sacrifices required to get them college-ready. If Walters felt this is the best course of action for her child, then so be it. I honestly can’t judge. Which is part of the reason why I’m asking you all. What do you make of Walters’ actions? Were they too much or just right?

 

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