Reasons It’s Actually Hard To Find A Good Man (And How to Find One Anyway)

June 15, 2016  |  
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Any woman who has been on a date in the past few years has asked herself the question: “Why is it so hard to find a good man?” Date enough men who seem like they wouldn’t be a good fit for anyone and the question just so happens to pop up. Are all of the good men in hiding or are you the only one having trouble finding them?

Well, we’ve talked to lots of women and we’ve discovered that the problem isn’t us. Every woman has experienced the struggle because it is hard to find a good man now more than ever. But once you know what’s standing in your way from finding one, it’s easier to know where to look.

Now we want to know how you found your good man. Did you follow these rules? Or did you find your significant other in a surprising place? Share your story with us in the comment section.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Hookup Apps

From Tinder to Disckreet, it’s easier than ever for men to find flings when they’re not ready to settle down. If your definition of a good man is someone who’s looking for more than one evening in the sack, don’t make these apps your first stop.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Dating Apps

Looking for something serious doesn’t mean avoiding digital dating altogether. This survey found that some apps are better at attracting good men than others.

Start with Match, eHarmony and some of the other commitment-friendly sites and you’ll have better luck finding the right companion.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Hookup Culture

Once upon a time, going on a date meant you were both looking to get to know each other better and find something significant. These days, after-work drinks can just be the step before after-work sex.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Honest Culture

Letting a man know that you’re looking for something serious on a first date is a good way to weed out someone looking for a fling. It may have seemed kind of forward once upon a time, but in a world where hooking up is almost more common than dating these days, stating your intentions is important.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

They’re Not on the Dating Scene

Dating can be intimidating — especially when you think it’s still a man’s job to make the first move. With that in mind, a lot of good men just skip the dating scene altogether.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Look in Alternative Places

Get yourself invited to office parties, dinners, church events and other happenings where you can socialize without the pressure of creating a romantic spark.

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We’re All Looking for Something “Better”

And in a world with so many options, it’s tempting to hold out until you feel like you’ve really seen what’s out there.

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Don’t Settle

In this day and age, putting your effort into turning a pretty good man into a great one is better than heading back to the dating pool for some. Hard pass on that.

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Because Marriage Is Going Out of Style

Once upon a time, jumping the broom was the endgame for most serious relationships. But while people are still getting married, not all men have that in mind.

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Find the Marriage-Minded Crowd

Not everyone is taking a pass on matrimony. Your best bet for finding a marriage-minded partner? Through your married friends. They might be able to hook you up.

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Some Men Just Don’t Want To Grow Up

Some men just don’t want to grow up. Once upon a time, taking one-night stands and video games into your late 30s wasn’t cool.

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Focus on Grown Men

If he’s still dressing and acting like a kid, chances are he wants to be one forever. Focus on men who carry themselves like adults to find one who’s ready for an adult relationship.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Baggage

The effects of some past relationships tend to hold us back longer than they should. And it’s definitely hard to find a good man when you’re focused on the one you needed to let go of.

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Image Source: Shutterstock

Lighten Your Load

Sometimes you need more than time to get over an ex. Something as simple as a self-help book or counseling session can help you find good men where you didn’t see them before.

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