Ask A Very Smart Brotha: He Talked To His Ex For 30 Mins, Should I Be Worried

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Lorne: Hey Damon, how would a young woman that is stable and very mature be serious with an older man? Do they just automatically not take them serious because of the age?

DY: Depends on the age difference and the personality/relationship history of the people involved

LaToya: My husband’s ex called him the other day && he told her he was busy then hung up. I checked his phone this morning && it said they had a 35 minute convo last night while he was at work. Should I be worried ??

DY: Worried? Not if this is the only instance. But, going through his phone proves you don’t completely trust him, and since you already don’t trust him you might as well just ask him what’s up.

Lekanjala: I am dating this guy and he has two kids and today I was recently told that he might have another on the way. I don’t have any kids and its very overwhelming to figure out if I should stay in a relationship with him or if I should leave, Not because of his kids but because I want to make sure that I am not making the wrong decision. He is a very good guy just has made wrong choices with three different woman. He is 24 and I am 28

DY: I think you should wish him luck, and break up with him before you end up pregnant by osmosis

Janet: Damon,

I don’t know if my question is a statement

I am a 47 accomplish and professional woman. I’ve been divorced over 25 years dating off and on. I recently have met and made a commitment to the love of my life. We met in February of this year, and have been dating since then and made a commitment to each other in November. I guess people are surprised because no one knew that I was dating.

He is everything a mature woman dreams of. Thoughtful, caring, loving and respectful. He says what he means and means what he says.

I guess my question is how do you deal with people who are skeptical of your relationship? Including family and friends. We are happy in love and planning our life’s together.

We have no plans to marry but just to be committed and to be life partners.

He spoils me with his love, care and attention and with nice gifts. I guess people are waiting for the shoe to drop. They said he’s too good to me.

Respectfully, JB

DY: Do these people have a reason to be skeptical, or is the hate just coming out of nowhere?

Laverne: Hey. What is the difference between dating and talking to someone? I kinda thought they were the same. Also, what’s your take on younger men and older women ? I would assume adult depends on the level of maturity

DY: They’re the same to me. Dating/talking both comprise that state before someone’s in a committed relationship. And the age difference thing depends on the age gap and the personalities of both involved

Latrease: Hello…I’m in a relationship with this guy I’ve known about 20 years off and on….here’s the thing he says he loves me but i don’t feel it in my heart and when we have sex i never orgasm but he always does. …maybe my heart won’t let me feel him like he feels me….then i cant stop talking to my other male friends although I don’t have sex with them. I feel like we’re not connecting emotionally .

DY: Um…why are you even in this relationship?

Monique: Steve Harvey says don’t act like a wife to a man that’s not your husband. But my dude tells me he needs to see these wifely things to know if he wants to marry me. But at the same time I’m like but I’m not your wife. Idk what to do.

DY: Easy. Do what feels comfortable and right to you. If you want to make him a sandwich, make him a sandwich. If you don’t want to make him a sandwich, don’t make him a sandwich.

Le’leine: How like likely is it for a long distance relationship to work, and how long should you stay apart? Last question , how can you keep it going/interesting?. Thanks!

DY: In my opinion, long distance relationships are doomed unless both parties have an agreed on plan to both eventually be in the same location

Christina: Hi…my man has been M.I A since last Monday we did talk over the phone and he always said Oh I’ll call you back later so when I called him last Friday he told me to give him a call back when the weekend was over now the weekend is over and he isn’t talking to me hehe he’s ignoring my calls I just don’t know exactly what’s going on with him and mind you we been together for almost 4 years please inbox me

So my question to you is do you think that he seeing someone else or is he trying to break up with me without confronting me about or does he just needs just needs his space please inbox me with something

DY: Those are questions you need to ask him when you see him again. But, people who want to be in relationships usually don’t disappear like that

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