10 Takeaways From “Married At First Sight”

September 17, 2014  |  
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I don’t have cable so it wasn’t until I was home at my parents’ house when I first saw “Married At First Sight.” I’ll be honest at first I found it disrespectful. I appreciate the sanctity of marriage and take it seriously. It just seemed like the show was going to be making a mockery of the whole thing, all for some ratings.

But then I started watching. And after the first ten minutes, I was all in. All the way in. The concept was fascinating and I really believed that the couples really were adamant about being married.

After all these people went through a background check and psych evaluation to ensure that they were actually ready for this process. And after that they took an extensive personality test and questionnaire to find their ideal mate. So after watching a majority of the season and then the reunion show afterward, here are some takeaways.

Maybe arranged marriages aren’t so bad after all

It didn’t strike me that the premise of the show was basically a modern day arranged marriage until I made it through the first episode. And when you think about it that way, you start to realize, it’s almost like a throwback to how things used to be done. And I’m certainly not saying it’s something I would do but I get it. I really get it. There really is something to be said about making a commitment and then sticking to it…if it is indeed the right person.

Physical attractiveness is not everything

First, let me say did anyone else think that Jamie looked a little familiar? Well, that’s because homegirl was once a contestant on “The Bachelor.” In other words, she’s been searching for this love thang for a long time. And while she believed she was ready to take that plunge, when she first saw her groom at the end of the aisle, she was not physically attracted to him…at all. And she had no qualms about letting that be known. She was pretty much in tears throughout her entire wedding day and barely wanted him to touch her. She took a good, long minute to warm up to him. But she eventually did.

Doug lying to Jamie

We could tell that Jamie was finally opening up to Doug when she decided to take him to her childhood home, in a trailer park. And though she wasn’t really ready to open up about all that had happened to her there, Doug was sympathetic. And the day was generally a success. But all of that went out of the window that very same night when Doug lied about smoking a cigarette. And it wasn’t that he smoked a cigarette, it was the fact he lied about it, swearing on his mother. Ugh! It was vile. And all we saw was the aftermath. What was so devastating about it was the fact that Doug’s silly lie, destroyed the trust that they’d worked so hard to build with one another. After that, I really thought it was a wrap for them.

Obviously, you know they’re still together and madly in love and all that. And on another note, did you notice that Doug had those bumps on his face removed?

Vaughn and Monet

Perhaps not so surprisingly, I was the most invested in Vaughn and Monet’s relationship. But honey they had all types of struggles. All types. They couldn’t communicate well. It was clear Monet didn’t respect Vaughn. (Remember the time she said he had potential, on some type of sneak diss?) Vaughn didn’t know how to act filming when things weren’t cool with the two of them off camera. And both of them used some pretty harsh words to cut each other down. The one thing they knew how to do was have sex, no matter what was going on around them. Which was interesting. But that’s where their chemistry ended.

Just so you know, most of the rest of this piece is about these two.

Does She Know What She Wants?

I think it was really interesting that Monet said she wanted a traditional man but only considered what he would do for her. She didn’t consider what traditional roles for a woman might be. Like a man with traditional values will want you to cook, if not always, often. A traditional man might also have a problem with the fact that he had to move into your apartment, instead of you into his or you two picking a new place together. And he also won’t be too cool about feeling emasculated. But I do understand her disappointment in that she felt– and Vaughn’s own mother confirmed– that perhaps he wasn’t as focused as he needed to be in his career. The most beneficial thing about this situation is the fact that they both realized they had some work to do on themselves.


“There’s nothing wrong with your hand.”

Ugh! This was a direct quote from Vaughn that Monet shared to his chagrin on the show. Remember the day he picked her up after her foot surgery? Even though I considered that the absolute least he could do, he was expecting sex. And when Monet said, understandably, that she wasn’t in the mood, Vaughn was hot about it. And told her “there was nothing wrong with her hand.” Hella rude. Vaughn said it was because of all of the pent up frustration about their other issues.

It was over long before we knew it was over

Honestly, there were times when I thought Vaughn and Monet were going to pull through in the last moment and make it work. But seeing things the way they are now, cussing at each other on the reunion, it’s clear that was never going to happen. And in fact, Vaughn confirmed that things were over long before we knew they were over on his Facebook page. See what he had to say.

**Sorry so long but here’s my response to the final episode****The results are out while I’m sure there will be a lot of backlash for our decision, it was truly in OUR best interest. I know a lot of fans were rooting for us to stay together but off camera where the relationship really mattered the chemistry between us, just was not there.

While some things were def taken out of context, I believe the show is groundbreaking by attempting to bring intelligent, thought provoking programming that really makes the audience question their own relationships. I hope more than anything that everybody can reflect on their own lives and learn from all three couples in this experiment. 

We apologize if anyone feels slighted or misled but of course we had to play along to uphold the final episode. Almost 6 months have gone by since filming and Monet and I are good friends with no hard feelings in between. 

Thanks again to Kinetic Content, FYI, family and friends who offered amazing support through these last few months and of course the fans for watching.

It’ll make you question your own relationships

I’m not married and quite far from it. So I asked my mother, who’s currently in my best example of marriage, about whether or not she could relate to these couple’s experiences. Did she have communication issues with my dad when they first moved in together? Could she have sex if she was angry? And course the role real trust plays in a relationship. It was interesting to see the ways in which she was similar and different from the couples on screen.

This will work

Honey, it’s already been confirmed that there is a season 2 of “Married at First Sight.” They’ve already released a casting video and everything else, looking for new couples. And I’m so ready.

And if you missed the reunion, you can watch the whole thing here.


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