The Psychology of ‘Cheating Down’

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In a flurry of arrogance we men can sometimes be vocal about how the side chick is less than and therefore not deserving of a title as grand as our girlfriend. So now the man has sowed the seeds of destruction and jealousy into his part time lover. He’s created a cat like rift between the woman he loves and the woman he could care less about but has given the advantage of valuable intel. Lastly, any relationship takes time, even if it’s an 11pm phone call of convenience (booty calls are so ’90s). So if you want that 11pm lustful rendezvous you’re going to have to text a little more, email a little more, and an occasional phone call because you can’t have your ticking time bomb feeling like her only usefulness is to service you when your girlfriend isn’t around or because you’re bored.

If there’s a moral to this story, it’s that cheating down doesn’t work. I would implore both men and women to be faithful but something tells me the variety of life will keep enticing us to get into these self-destructive scenarios. I hope my brothers (myself included) will learn the definition of insanity — doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. At the very least I hope that women can find clarity in knowing that your man didn’t want to replace you, he’s just greedy and wants to eat the whole cake by himself. If your significant other is cheating, you have bigger issues to worry about rather than if she’s an upgrade or a downgrade, i.e. STD’s. This upgrade/downgrade business is the shallow part of our ego wanting to hide the hurt and find something else to focus on. When really, finding out that your lover has been unfaithful is a time to reflect on how your relationship went wrong. Take some time and re-evaluate the signs that you may have ignored so that you can attempt to prevent this type of situation in the future. Peace and Love.

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