You Want What Now? 7 Subtle Signs From Women That Men Often Miss

May 15, 2012  |  
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Men don’t do so well with subtleties. They work better on cold hard facts, viewing these as the best tools to make decisions, so they often miss subtle cues, clues and signs about what women want or feel at any given time.

You put it down, but he doesn’t pick it. Not because he’s being difficult, but because you’re not being straightforward enough for a man’s rather obtuse communication skills. At times, this may make him seem distant or disinterested, when really he has no clue what you’re getting at.

Here’s a run down at the types of subtleties and messages men often miss:


The “I need affection” signs

Women are always asking their men for emotional presence, something viewed entirely different from physical presence in her eyes. But a man’s typical response to this is “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t care,” so he’s not even tuned in to subtle cues you try to send that are supposed to say that you need more affection.

The “I want to be friends” signs

You’ve given every indication that you see him as a friend, and maybe you’ve even convinced yourself he accepts that. But the truth is, any signal that falls short of you proclaiming, “I just want to be friends,” or “I’m just not into you in that way” is too subtle for a dude. He’s probably still trying to tap that.

The “I want a kiss” signs

Guys know they have to take risks when it comes to getting a gal, but the fear of rejection is real, which ends up putting a lot of dudes up in the friend zone unintentionally. You coyly look into his eyes and smile, look to his lips, then look away, thinking that’s an obvious kiss me signal. Yet and still, it goes right over some guys’ heads.

The “I want sex” signs.

You’ve put him through the obligatory number of dates and now you’re ready to take it to the next level. There are a few sure fire ways to let him know (like a hand in the crotch or playing the, “Let’s go back to my place” game), but most options might come off a little too forward for many ladies.

The “I’m not happy” signs

Good luck if you’re being passive aggressive, giving the silent treatment or politely showing your displeasure in hopes that he’ll “pick up on it.” He may find your odd behavior slightly amusing, inconvenient, and even sum it up with the belief that this it might be that time of the month.  But by playing all those games you’ll be screaming before he figures out that it might be time to see what your problem is.

The “I like you” signs

Trying to let a guy know you’re into him with occasional touches during a conversation or fixing his collar generally don’t register in his mind unless you’re persistent. In most cases, you have to make a first really bold move if he’s slow to catch on. Whether that involves a kiss or just giving it to him straight (verbally of course), that’s up to you. But don’t expect him to immediately understand your flirtations as more than that early on.

The “I want to break up” signs

You’re over it, but know he’s a nice guy and want to spare his feelings, so you say things like “time apart,” “I’m not sure,” or just don’t answer his call for affection at all. You think he should get the idea, but since he hasn’t heard “no” or “It will never happen,” he probably thinks he’s still got a shot. Subtle signs in this category is just as effective as intentionally leading someone on. Just keep it real.

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