Life moves faster than ever in this day and age. Few people expect to spend days pondering questions–a quick Google search will suffice. Each season, you buy into the newest fashion, trend or over hyped product and replace working items with newer models. Sweeping corporate layoffs are common and job security means keeping your resume up to date to woo your next potential employer.
In short, Western society has placed diminishing value on investing time and effort into people or things. Your life is filled with a series of possessions ephemeral from the onset. Typically, when something’s outdated, broken or less than exciting, you’re looking to ditch it and pick up something new.
It’s easy for these attitudes to spill over into how we handle and view marriage. It’s becoming increasingly difficult to find a mate who cherishes the notion of “living happily ever after” in a world that places emphasis on routinely upgrading to the latest. So why waste time with a guy who clearly doesn’t?
Here are signs he isn’t going to pop the question:
You’re Not his Prized Possession
These days everyone’s out busy accumulating things: careers, homes, memories of traveling the world: things you place value on. If someone to spend the rest of your life with is at the top of your list, it should be topping his list too. If you’re not the most important thing in his life, or close to it, you’re not the one for him.
He’s Got Parental Issues
Maybe he’s been negatively affected by his parent’s split. Perhaps he grew up in a family that places no importance on marriage. It doesn’t matter exactly what the issue is because we’re all a product of the environment our parents created. It’s unfortunate that childhood trauma damages future relationships but it happens.
He’s Petty in His Criticisms
Everyone has quirks and flaws that define who they are. It’s a huge red flag if you’re with a guy that doesn’t accept yours. No one’s perfect, but he’ll treat you like you are more often than not if he plans on making you a wife. In other words, he’s accepts, even celebrates or coddles your flaws.
Note: His willingness to have sex with you does not mean he accepts your imperfections.
He Sacrifices Nothing to Have You
When a man really wants a woman, there is little he won’t do to convince her he’s the right guy. All throughout history, men have gone to war, changed their religion, and do complete 180s for the lady he can’t live without. So if you and your boo are all good until he’s put in an inconvenient place or decision, you’re not going to hear wedding bells with him.
Avoids the Conversation
Experts hold that a mans readiness to marry is 49% the right woman and 51% the right time. Women intuitively sense this and that’s how you get caught up in the waiting game. In many cases, it is just a matter of time but the waiting game is always a crappy strategy, especially when he always avoids, becomes irate or puts off the topic of marriage.
No Married Couple Friends
At 20, we expect you’ll have no married friends. 30, things may start to look half and half, but this is still young adult stage, so you must account for late bloomers. But if he’s pushing 40 and better and none of his friends are married or living in baby-mama’d unions, he is choosing his friends very carefully and losing those that don’t fit his single and happy lifestyle. Unless he tells you otherwise, you and your hopes for marriage won’t ruin what he’s got going.
He Says, “I don’t believe in Marriage.”
When a girl likes a guy, she’s prone to hear what she wants, putting a positive spin on statements that should be red flags. These are definitely words you want to take at face value.
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