Source: Adene Sanchez / Getty
Dear Ashley,
I have been with my fiancé for 14 years. We have never broken up and we have two kids together. However, he’s waaaaay more experienced than me sexually. In addition to that, there are certain things he wanted to do that I wouldn’t do because he wasn’t my “husband.”
So, now, we are getting married next month and this man thinks I’m about to bust it wide open. Girl, I have ZERO tricks up my sleeve! I never thought I would be married and now I’m stuck like Chuck WTF!!
HELP!!!
Ms. Soon to be his wife
Dear Ms. Soon To Be His Wife,
Why do we as women assign certain sexual acts for marriage but don’t mind doing everything else? Y’all have been together 14 years and have two kids. You’ve already started a family with this man. Why hold back in the bedroom? If you can’t back dat azz up and bust it wide open for the man you’ve been with it for almost two decades then who can you bust it open for?
But you came to the right place because I’m about to get you right for your wedding night. I’m not exactly sure what you need, so I’m going to give you a little bit of everything from that Gawk Gawk 300 to riding dick like a stolen car. When it comes to sex you can never have too many tricks up your sleeve and no matter how good you think you are there is ALWAYS room for improvement. So grab a pen and paper and let’s begin.
If you want to learn how to slob on his knob and possibly be known as the throat goat then you need to sign up for Goody Howard’s “Lick” workshop. Goody Howard is a sex educator who offers pleasure workshops for people like yourself who are looking to spice up or learn new bedroom techniques. Her blowjob class “Lick” will provide tips and tricks that can be used to take the work out of the job. Her workshop covers everything from gag reflex to how to add toys and edibles to your performance.
How good are you at riding? Sex expert Tyomi Morgan has a Cowgirl Workout that helps women who feel insecure about getting on top. In Tyomi’s workshop, she teaches how to build stamina and become more flexible. She uses low intensity training, twerk skills, pelvic floor exercises, breath work and sensual movements to help you connect with your mate.
If you are looking for something the two of you can do together, I suggest signing up for a sexercise class with Evoleros Studios. Sexercise are yoga-based sex classes held in California but is also offered virtually. The intro class is a perfect way for couples to get familiar with incorporating intimate positions with yoga to create an exciting sexercise routine that is guaranteed to be fun. Learn some of the basic exercises and yoga poses that will improve your performance in some of our favorite classics such as the elephant, doggy style and reverse cowgirl. This is a great way to try something different if you’ve never tried yoga before, or if you’ve always been a yogi and want to get your fitness workout on.
Try all of these and hopefully you’ll gain the confidence you need to bust it wide open on your wedding night.
Dear Ashley is a weekly sex column where Sexpert Ashley Cobb answers your intimate questions. Nothing is off-limits! Have a sex question, Ashley, “Your Favorite Friend In Filth,” has an answer. Email Ashley at ashley@sexwithashley.com
Ashley Cobb is the millennial microphone that brings the conversation of Black women’s pleasure to the forefront. Creator of digital platform Gossip And Gasms, her work and words have been featured in Cosmopolitan, Men’s Health, Shape Magazine, Business Insider, and Huffington Post. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter via @sexwithashley
