During her chat with her mother Adrienne Banfield-Norris and guest Gwenyth Paltrow, she explained that communication is necessary to have a good sex life but it’s easier said than done.
“It’s hard,” Pinkett-Smith said. “The thing Will and I talk about a lot is the journey. We started in this at a very young age, you know, 22 years old. That’s why the accountability part really hit for me because I think you expect your partner to know [what you need], especially when it comes to sex. It’s like, ‘Well, if you love me, you should know. If you love me, you should read my mind.’ That’s a huge pitfall.”
Paltrow replied ,”Isn’t it weird, though? It’s like someone doesn’t read your mind and we feel crushed.”
“Crushed!,” the Girls Trip star agreed. “You tell me what you need. Tell me what you want, and on top of it, I know that I have to be accountable to do the same…I really try. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s deeply healthy, and I think around sex, because it’s something that we don’t talk about and there’s so much fantasy around it.”
The internet misconstrued Pinkett-Smith’s comments, though, and assumed that because she said having a good sex life was hard that it was troubled. So she took to Twitter–something she rarely does–to shut down the misconceptions.
“Only because I got time today,” she tweeted. “Stop making up headlines. Watch the @RedTableTalk I did with @GwynethPaltrow for yourselves. Will and I have NEVER had an issue in the bedroom. Thank you.”
The Smiths, who’ve been married since 1997,
often have conversations about their marriage and what they need to do to keep it spicy but also healthy. In GQ, Smith said since Pinkett-Smith’s views on marriage were different, they had to figure out what kind of relationship was best for them.
“Jada never believed in conventional marriage…Jada had family members that had an unconventional relationship,” he said. “So she grew up in a way that was very different than how I grew up. There were significant endless discussions about, what is relational perfection? What is the perfect way to interact as a couple? And for the large part of our relationship, monogamy was what we chose, not thinking of monogamy as the only relational perfection. We have given each other trust and freedom, with the belief that everybody has to find their own way. And marriage for us can’t be a prison.”