It’s too expensive. It distracts from one’s career. There’s currently a pandemic happening. These are some of the reasons millennials list for not wanting children. We’ve also gone over some statistically-driven reasons (like the fact that housing prices have skyrocketed while household incomes have stagnated). Within the millennial group, shaming our peers for not having children is, well, the truly shameful act now. If a millennial tells her peer she isn’t having kids, the only appropriate reaction is support. Your body, your choice. Your money your choice. Your sleep, your choice. We’ve made a healthy shift within our age group to not bat an eyelash when friends choose to go without kids. But there is an important assortment of words in there: within our age group. Those beyond our age group? That’s a different story.
Your parents won’t look at you having kids (or not having kids) from any sort of practical standpoint. For them, it’s raw emotions. For them, you’re ripping the dream of being grandparents from their fingertips if you choose to be childless. Why are you doing this to them? Whyyyyyy?! (Really, they’ll ask you that just like that, so be prepared to answer). Handling this conversation will require putting yourself in your parents’ shoes, as well as doing a masterful job of putting them in yours. Here is how to tell your parents you aren’t having kids.
This won’t cut back our family time
A big concern on your parents’ end might be that you not having children will mean them not spending much time with you as you get older. Grandchildren naturally bring families together. From pregnancy through high school graduation, children prompt many events that bring the family together. There are baby showers and kid’s birthday parties. Just wanting to see the grandkids is reason enough for your parents to ask to stop by. So they can fear that if you don’t have kids, the family will drift apart in some way. Assure them that will not happen, and that creating opportunities to spend time with them will always be important to you.