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When it comes to dating success, the experts will often tell you that consistency is key, but it is not often explained why consistency is so important. In an interview with TalkSpace, licensed clinical social worker Cynthia Catchings shared that while the chemistry that may exist between you and a potential partner can feel great, chemistry is ultimately not going to be what carries the relationship for the long haul. Consistency, however, can.
“Chemistry is necessary and good because it creates the desire and is part of the relationship game,” Catchings explained, “However, consistency has to take over for that relationship to succeed.”
But what exactly does consistency look like during the earlier stages of dating — especially when you’re not necessarily in a committed relationship just yet?
“Consistency is a combination of behaviors that include dependability, trust, and a true desire to have a companion and form a serious relationship,” Catchings says. “People who are more consistent with their interactions with one another, such as having predictable behaviors and good communication, have longer and more successful relationships.”
Of course, when you’re floating on cloud nine and experiencing the highly sought-after honeymoon phase at the beginning of a romance, the signs of an inconsistent lover can be easy to overlook. So here are the tell-tale signs of a consistent partner written out in black and white.
Regular contact
When dating someone, consistency looks like regular contact. The person will not disappear for days without so much as a text message and then reappear with a weak excuse like “I needed to get my head together” or worse, acting as if nothing happened.
