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There comes a time in every woman’s life when crosses the threshold of grown womanhood. Not every woman makes this transition at the same time and though it usually happens after a woman is past her 20s, age is no guarantee. One tell-tale sign that a person has reached grown-woman status is the company she keeps. Her ability and willingness for dealing with nonsense have significantly diminished and thus, many have been removed from her circle. Here are five friendships grown-women don’t entertain.

The frenemy

A frenemy is a person who parades around pretending to be a friend but in reality, she is a rival. Frenemies don’t really care for you, but they subscribe to the ideology that it’s best to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. The thing is, it’s somewhat difficult to hide true intentions longterm. Your frenemy doesn’t actually like you, which is why their actions toward you can come off somewhat erratic. Frenemies can best be compared to Sour Patch Kids. First, they’re sour. Then, they’re sweet. One minute they’re singing your praises and the next, they’re cutting you down.

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Why grown women don’t have frenemies

To entertain a frenemy means that you still have a high tolerance for nonsense and a truly grown woman does not. She doesn’t see the point in wasting her time or energy on any relationship where she has to question a person’s true motives. Once a so-called friend begins to display questionable behavior, she washes her hands of that person. She can use that energy on people who actually care about her.

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The competitor

It’s difficult to establish a solid friendship with a person who views you as their competition because, at the end of the day, they will always prioritize “winning” over the actual relationship. The competitor is someone who is always looking over your shoulder to be sure that you don’t surpass them in any aspect of life. They are constantly comparing themselves and looking for opportunities to one-up you. They delight in your misfortune and sulk when you’re doing well.

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Why grown women don’t compete with their friends

Once you’ve reached a certain level of maturity, petty competitions begin to matter much less. You want to see the people around you doing well because you believe that when the people you love are winning, you’re winning as well. Grown women don’t compete with their friends, they celebrate them.

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The situationship

There are some who want the perks of being a relationship without commitment. These people will often request girlfriend or wife benefits and lead you on.  They will not hesitate to holler “We’re just friends” when any form of consideration or reciprocity is requested. And they’re quick to tell you that you’re tripping when you attempt to establish boundaries.

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Why grown women don’t stay in situationships if they really want commitment

A woman who is truly sure of herself knows exactly what she wants. Friends with benefits is an arrangement that works for some, but a grown woman will not entertain this type of situationship if she knows that she wants something more. She knows that there’s no “reward” for playing your position in these scenarios.

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The taker

There are some people who only befriend us for what they stand to gain from being in relationship with us. They are the type of friends who seem to only surface when they need something. Whether it be to use us as a sounding board, to borrow money, or any other type of favor, when their phone number shows up on your cell phone, you can rest assured that they’re calling because they want something.

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Why grown women dead one-sided friendships

A grown woman knows that healthy relationships are about giving and taking. And while she may get sucked into a one-sided friendship for a little while, she will eventually come to the realization that this relationship is unhealthy and will cut her losses.

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The drama queen

Some people live in a constant state of drama and turmoil. And while this doesn’t make them “bad people,” they are especially difficult and draining to deal with. The one aspect we don’t often talk about when we discuss being in relationship with drama queens is how they tend to use their drama to control others. In addition, drama queens have a habit of dragging others into their mess.

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Why grown women keep drama queens at a distance

Life comes with its share of unexpected drama, which is why no one needs a person around who manufactures their own drama. No one has the energy to deal with a person who is always in crisis, which is why grown women keep friends like this at arm’s length.

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