Why We’re Buying Property Before Getting Married

October 4, 2019  |  
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buying property together not married

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This past week, two of our very good couple friends got engaged. It’s been a very happy week in our social circle. The funny thing is that, we’ve been together longer than both couples, so naturally, we received some comments. “It’ll be you two next!” some say, or the ones who know us really well said, “You guys are never going to get around to getting married, are you?” We’re on one of those millennial marriage trends of waiting a bit longer to tie the knot. But, hey, our generation has been proving to be more successful in marriage than the previous one, so maybe we’re onto something. I don’t want to give us too much credit and act like it was all a grand plan. We have, of course, discussed our future and want to get married one day. But one big reason we are holding off is that we have another big milestone in mind, first: buying property. Here’s why we’re buying a condo before getting married.

buying property together not married

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We want to cohabitate forever

This is our way of saying, “I want to live with you forever.” Right now, we are month-to-month on our apartment. At any given point, one of us could be out the door, with little to no financial implications. No paperwork. No lawyers. We know we want to live together forever, so we want to buy a place that will be our home for a long time. We aren’t putting just a ring on it: we’re putting a condo on it.

buying property together not married

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Rent keeps rising

Rent in our city continues to rise. We calculated it and realized that we could pay roughly the same on a mortgage that we are currently paying in rent. That’s when we felt very silly for throwing away any more money on rent, and made purchasing property a top priority. The cost of a wedding isn’t rising. There’s plenty of wiggle room in that market. We have no rush to hop on that train—at least not for financial reasons.

buying property together not married

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This feels like a big commitment

Honestly, this feels like a huge commitment. We have friends who will be getting married, but won’t share assets. They’ll continue to live in rented apartments once they’re married. So, really, should they split, the paperwork would be pretty simple. Splitting up when you own a home together is a real doozey. This is no small commitment.

buying property together not married

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We want to build a home together

We want to finally build a home together. We’ve never really made a place entirely our own, knowing we might have to move every few years as rent increases. We want to design a space to reflect our love and our life together, and when we own property, we finally can.

buying property together not married

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We only have the funds for one

We have exactly enough money to either put a down payment in on a home, or fund a wedding. That’s where we’re at. Some people are fortunate enough to have the money for both. Not us.

buying property together not married

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We feel this is more financially responsible

We feel that investing this money in a property that will appreciate and in a space that will make us happy is more responsible than spending it on a party that will last one day.

buying property together not married

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Maybe we’ll have our reception at home

Also, who knows? Maybe once we own a home, we’ll have our reception there (we want a tiny wedding). We won’t charge ourselves for the venue! So that’s a wedding saving.

buying property together not married

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It’s our way of bringing our families closer

Families become united when two people marry, and we are actually looking towards that, too. We want to get a place with enough rooms for both of our sets of parents to stay with us. We want to provide them a nice, free place to stay so when they visit, they can stay longer.

buying property together not married

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The contract is no joke

The contracts surrounding owning a home together are no joke. There are a lot of notaries involved. You have to go to the county clerk’s office and file a lot of paperwork. You don’t do that kind of thing if you don’t plan on spending your lives together. The paperwork is about as hefty (if not more) as wedding documents.

buying property together not married

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We’ve been living together for a while

We’ve been living together for four years now. Meanwhile, some of our friends who got engaged this year will only just live together for the first time after getting married. We feel very comfortable making the cohabitation commitment of buying together, because we’re already pros in the living together game.

buying property together not married

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It’s an investment in our future, together

We are investing in our future. This property is meant to be an insurance policy for our retirement. We hope to get a place that will appreciate, so we can sell it one day and use that money to continue to enjoy our golden years together. In our own way, this is our “’til death do us part” vow.

buying property together not married

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It could fund closer dreams

The property is also meant to be a way to fund some nearer dreams. We may want to live in another state for a few years, and would use it as a rental property. Or, we may rent out one of the rooms for some extra income, freeing us up for travel and adventures. The property is about bringing us closer together, and giving us the opportunity to have more experiences together.

buying property together not married

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It’s a good time to buy

Realistically, now is a good time to buy. We could try to do things the traditional way and get married first, but we know our wedding would come after the next election, and nobody knows how elections affect property values. This is the time to pull the trigger.

buying property together not married

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Even our parents approve

Believe it or not, both of our parents were impressed and excited by the idea of us buying. They didn’t say, “Don’t you want to get married, first?” They see how we’re committed to one another. Our parents, who have a lot of wisdom about money and more, back this decision.

buying property together not married

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We both have divorced parents

We also both have divorced parents, whose financial situation was a total mess after getting a divorce. They got married first, then acquired assets together, and later, faced a hell of a complicated split-up. We want the opposite. We want to keep things simple: property, for now. Marriage later.

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