It’s hard to shake that urge to please our parents. For the first 18 years of our lives (or really, for as long as they paid our bills—which, for some millennials, lasts for a while), we are trained to do what makes our parents happy. They put food on the table, buy us things, and keep us alive and safe for the first formative years of our lives so, the desire to do what they say is ingrained in us. However, eventually, it’s so important for your happiness and overall development to separate your identity from your parents’. Yes, they raised you and they know you pretty well, but at the end of the day, nobody knows you as well as you do. And, furthermore, you have to remember that your parents have their own baggage and trauma that influences the advice they give you, so their guidance is far from unbiased or pure. On that note, here is why you need to stop trying to please your parents.
They may not know what’s best for you
Your parents do not necessarily know what circumstances, environment, job, or friendships will cause you to thrive. My mom, for example, has always pushed me to get a regular, 9 to 5 office job, thinking the freelance life might be depressing and unhealthy for me. In reality, the 9 to 5 environment kills my soul, and I feel most happy and liberated in this lifestyle.