If a friend of yours is dating the ex of your current partner, do you and said partner deserve a heads up if they choose to bring that ex around? And by around, that is, nowhere near you but in the same building?
During last night’s episode of Love and Hip Hop New York, things went extremely awry when Joe Budden confronted so-called friend Safaree Samuels about the fact that he brought new girlfriend (now fianéee) Erica Mena on their Costa Rican getaway. Cyn Santana, Joe’s girlfriend at the time (also now fiancée) used to date Erica. And to be clear, she didn’t come on the trip with everyone. Instead, she came along later and stayed away from the group.
Still, Joe was irate about the fact that Erica was at their resort, and that he and Cyn weren’t given a heads up (they found out via Instagram). This is specifically so because Joe called up Safaree before they even all decided to come to Costa Rica to find out if she would be there, “so I could know how to move and dictate my household in the appropriate manner.” When he realized he didn’t get that from his “friend,” Joe confronted Safaree in front of all of the cast members who traveled to Costa Rica, and literally screamed at him when he said he didn’t feel like he needed to apologize.
“That was a simple f–king text if you care about the relationship,” Joe said. Cyn backed up her man by telling Safaree in dramatic fashion, “You held my child!”
The couple treated the situation as the ultimate betrayal.
“When you’re running round with homegirl, have a f–king blast my ni–a. But when it’s in close proximity to my family, it’s a security breach,” Joe said. “I don’t play family games!”
Still, Safaree maintained that “It’s my business and nobody’s seeing her.” That didn’t go over well at all.
“Fam, if I’m putting d–k in Nicki Minaj and I fly her out here, ni–a, that’s your business!” Joe yelled. “You keep talking my ni–a and it’s gonna go a different way. You hear me my ni–a? I’m not playing with you!”
It was a lot, honestly.
However, let me play devil’s advocate really fast. Now, I do believe that if someone you deem a friend asks you for a heads up about something that could make them and their significant other uncomfortable, it’s not ridiculous for them to be upset if you tell them they have nothing to worry about, and then when the situation changes, don’t inform them. Erica may not have been anywhere around them, but on a resort, you never know when people might encounter one another simply walking around. Not to mention, Cyn could feel upset that Safaree is seeing her ex, and rightfully so. However, speaking to her about it to ensure there would be no static wasn’t considered because Safaree likely didn’t take that relationship seriously. And while many a Love and Hip Hop relationship is far from serious, and even though Safaree can do what he wants, out of respect for his friendship with Joe and Cyn, giving them a heads up about things would have been nice.
Still, Joe’s delivery was horrific. For one, you shouldn’t confront people publicly about something you’re supposedly very hurt about, especially if the initial conversation happened off-screen. Secondly, you’re never going to get someone to agree with you by screaming at them and threatening them. Thirdly, Joe has a penchant, as do many of the men in the cast, for trying to “son” Safaree, because they know he is not one to buck up and fight. If Joe truly ever considered him a friend, that tone should have been checked. Also, never start a convo asking someone, “Don’t you think you owe me an apology?” That’s not a discussion to resolve anything. That’s an attempt to say “I’m right, you’re wrong, now give me an apology, my ni–a!” I think all things considered, Safaree handled himself well, though he was still wrong. But again, so was Joe. And really, it seemed more so that he was upset that Erica was around out of a place of insecurity — not out of hurt and a security concern.
And for the record, Erica appreciated none of last night’s conversation:
Twitter went off about this scene last night, and good points (as well as comical ones) were made all around. Hit the flip and let us know what you think: