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A certain psychology professor is taking quite a bit of heat right now for his research and publications on the gender pay gap, and women in the workplace. I can understand how his words have stirred up quite a bit of anger. I’m not going to even attempt to assess or break down his hypothesis, nor give my opinion on them. What I will say is this: listening to him speak—whether I liked what he said or not—sent me into a bout of self-reflection. I started to think about where I am in my career, where I want to be, and what steps would bridge the gap between the former and the latter. It quickly becomes clear to me that the only thing standing in my way is me. There are things I want, and specific people who I know can give me those things, but I don’t ask for them. If you’re like me then, you might be a head case about self-promotion and pursuing opportunities. If you’re like me then being extremely assertive and even taking something that somebody else might want can feel unnatural. But perhaps I should resist that tendency. Here are ways to stop being such a head case about self-promotion.
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Being demure doesn’t get rewarded
Nobody is going to give you an opportunity because you were demure. People in power do not sit around and think, “Hmm. Who hasn’t bothered me or asked for something? I’ll reward their quietness.” It doesn’t work that way in the professional world. So while it’s true that maybe those who ask for things are a bit annoying, the people of whom they ask things don’t even think to appreciate the fact that you aren’t annoying. They’re too busy dealing with the squeaky wheel in front of them.
