Courtesy of OWN/ Photographer: Richard DuCree
Shatava Lindsey knows what it takes to run a successful business. The 35-year-old Chattanooga, Tennessee native owns Runway Boutique in Nashville, has her own clothing line in the Ourglass Collection, and is preparing to open another boutique in her adopted home of Atlanta. But when it comes to what it takes to find love, she needed some help.
“It’s been a struggle and I think it’s maybe a little bit of my fault,” she said over the phone. “I’ve been so in tune with my business, trying to get everything together that maybe I have been passing Mr. Right. But the guys that I have come into contact with just haven’t been guys with anything going on that really interests me.”
The fact that Lindsey has been prosperous in her business endeavors, therefore allowing her to be very independent, is also something she thinks has made it difficult to find the right match.
“You know, when you come already having everything together and not needing pretty much anything financially from a guy, it’s a little intimidating because like with me, I’m really into who he is as a person, what he brings to the table, his characteristics. It’s not about what he has,” she said. “So a lot of guys I’ve noticed tend to lead with material things, what they can do for me financially. And I’m like, no, I’m good there. I just need a guy that’s of good substance. A God-fearing man. Just a really good man who can be one with me.”
So in an effort to find all of that, Lindsey decided to try out for OWN’s new dating show, Ready to Love. Produced by Will Packer and hosted by Nephew Tommy of The Steve Harvey Morning Show, the series tries to help successful Black women and men in their 30s and 40s in the city of Atlanta find a lasting connection. Twenty people are brought together and then they will narrow down one another until only three couples remain. What makes this show different from all of the other dating series out there, is that we will get to hear what the men think. Their observations and experiences while getting to know and date the women on the show will be highlighted. That was something that piqued Lindsey’s interest.
“It’s always interesting to know how a guy feels about dating you,” she said. “You know, how they perceive women, whether it’s how they look at your hair, how you present yourself. It’s very interesting to know what they think about who we are as women.”
She continued, “It’s going to be interesting to know that this guy wasn’t interested in this particular girl and why he wasn’t interested in her, so that way maybe she’ll know what she needs to change about herself going forward.”
Courtesy of Shatava Lindsey
Lindsey was also drawn to the fact that those behind the show had weeded through all of the prospective men to find the cream of the crop in the city.
“I’ve been out here dating. I haven’t been able to find the right guy,” she added. “So knowing that there are some really nice-looking eligible Black men that have their stuff together that will be on the show? I wanted to see what it was about.”
However, there was a lot to be nervous about, too. As someone building a brand for themselves (a brand that includes a lot of mentoring and philanthropic work), anytime you choose to put yourself on reality TV, there’s a possibility that things could backfire and it could affect that brand. Still, she she chose to go into the process with an open mind and heart.
“I just think people have their own perception of you, and they’re going to make up their mind how they feel about you. So I just wanted to make sure I’m communicating my message and who I am,” she said. “Although I’ve been out here, I haven’t been able to find someone. I’m just like everybody else, every other woman that’s out here doing their business, on top of their business, and they can’t find someone. So I was just very careful as far as how I worded what I wanted just because I didn’t want it to look a certain way or reflect on my business.”
But in the end, at least for the moment, Lindsey is doing something she hasn’t done in a long time: She’s allowing her business to take a backseat to her personal life. It’s something she would encourage more women do if they want more for themselves romantically.
“You have to have a work-life balance. Like with me, I put work in front of so much in my life,” she said. “At the end of the day you can have all the money in the world, but if you have no one to share it with, you’re not going to be happy. So you have to make that time to find someone that you can share your good times with. I mean, I get so tired of going on vacation with my girlfriends. I’m very old-school and I love to be courted. I love going to movies, doing picnics, that type of thing. So you have to make time for that. You can’t work 100 percent of the time. You have to make time for your personal life as well. That’s what I had not been doing enough of.”
Ready to Love has a two-night premiere on Tuesday, Oct. 23 (10 p.m. EST) and Saturday, Oct. 27 (10 p.m. EST). The series will air on Saturdays at that time for the remainder of its run. Check out the trailer below:
