MadameNoire Featured Video

female friendships difficult of friends holding together back

Ten years ago, I always had a social event (or a few) on the books every day of the week. I was rarely alone. In fact, I had to fight just to create a little alone time for myself. I had ongoing text threads going with several circles of friends. I felt quite popular, really. But, my friend group has dropped off significantly since then. And, from what I’ve discovered, that’s pretty normal. As you get older, you just become more selective about whom you spend time with. Between your career becoming more demanding and your romantic relationship becoming more serious, you just don’t have time to meet up with the crew three times a week at the favorite watering hole. Shows like “How I Met Your Mother” and “Friends” make it seem like adults actually have time for this. They don’t—unless they literally all live in the same building. And then even still, they don’t. Here is why my friend group has shrunk over the years, and why I’m okay with that.


Some are career-obsessed

Some of my friends have become so career-obsessed that they really don’t make time for anything else these days. I definitely respect their hustle, but I fear they’ve lost sight of what matters most in life: personal relationships. I can’t, however, teach them that. I am also busy, and only make time for friends who already recognize the value of friendship.

Comment Disclaimer: Comments that contain profane or derogatory language, video links or exceed 200 words will require approval by a moderator before appearing in the comment section. XOXO-MN