All Articles Tagged "children"
As humans, we know that we have limitations. None of us are omniscient, all powerful, or can break the barriers of time and space; and we accept that about ourselves. The only time that it’s difficult to accept the shortcomings of a person is when you are a parent and you’re observing your child. I would always get so angry and annoyed at my own parents when I felt like they wanted me to be a superwoman of sorts. Being late was unacceptable, even though one of them sped to work every day. If I was having a bad day, I was supposed to keep it all inside, but they were allowed to take their bad day out on others. Even to this day I still feel annoyed with it, but I realize that it’s something that I’m going to struggle with as a parent myself.
My daughter is the love of my life. Seeing her little head come bouncing toward me is one of the greatest things in this world to me, and I look forward every day to sitting on the couch with a book, her sitting next to me with hers, and watching her mimick every time I turn a page. I look at her and see nothing but possibilities. So when she hit her second birthday and she hadn’t started talking yet, I have to be honest, it scared me.
Every parent who’s involved with their child looks forward to the day that their child start’s speaking. I heard the excitement in my sisters’ voices while they exclaimed that their children said their first words, and there was a bittersweet feeling when I would hear my niece or nephews (two of them are younger than my daughter) talking in the background, while my child only pronounced hard, consonant, guttural sounds.
At the beginning of her life when she would go see the doctor, he would ask questions about her development, and she was always on track, except for when it came to speech. Each doctor visit I would dread having to feign a smile and say: ”Well, she’s not really saying those sounds yet, but we tend to communicate strongly on a non-verbal level.” He would smile back and suggest that I should seek early intervention.
During her last doctor visit he asked me if I’d looked into early intervention yet. I was honest, told him no, and he asked me why. That’s when I realized that I was scared of what they might say. I feel as though my daughter is smart and amazing, but if they reveal her limitations to me, then its something that’s concrete, something that I’ll have to face, handle, acknowledge. It would shine a light on my own incompetence as a mother, and beckon of light would echo on my child. They’re right, ignorance is bliss, and I wasn’t ready to give that happiness up yet.
It wasn’t until thinking about my own development, and one of my sisters reminding me that we also needed speech therapy when we were younger. As a child, I stuttered and my sister had a problem pronouncing her words correctly. However, our parents put us in therapy to help. My sister reminded me that just because we couldn’t talk didn’t mean that we were any less intelligent than anyone else, and it’s the same thing for my baby.
I feel like sometimes, as African Americans, getting professional help can have such a negative connotation to it. We’re supposed to be strong, and our children will be too. But, just because you have to get some outside help shouldn’t be a bad thing. Your child is amazing, but sometimes getting help at the earliest time is the best thing for them. It can be scary, and it will be scary, but just remember that you’re doing what’s best for your child, and that’s what being a good parent is all about.
Kendra Koger loves her daughter. You should love her twitter account @kkoger.
Beyoncé Knowles-Carter may be basking in the joys of motherhood, but sister-friend Kelly Rowland says she’s not quite ready to be about that mommy life and seeing Bey with baby Blue is not giving her baby fever. The “Kisses Down Low” singer recently chatted it up with E! News on the red carpet at the Elle Women of Music event in New York. She honestly revealed to Alicia Quarles that she’s not ready to be a mother just yet and has no shame in admitting it.
“I’m not ready, I’m not ready to have a child. I can be very honest,” she revealed.
“Because right now, I’m a bit selfish, a lot—I was gonna say a little—but I’m still selfish,” 32-year-old Rowland added.
She went on to say that she really enjoys having her time to herself and that she isn’t exactly ready to share it with another person.
“I like my time, I like to wake up whenever I want to and I like to come and go as I please. I don’t know if I’m ready to share that time with another person, I don’t wanna mess them up,” Kelly confessed.
She did, however, reveal that she’s down to babysit baby Blue if ever Bey needed her to. We certainly can’t blame Ms. Kelly for wanting to do her thing before settling down and having babies. It seems that there is a lot more she hopes to accomplish, not to mention her forthcoming Talk a Good Game album, which is slated to drop later this year. It’s hard not to respect her honesty.
Click here to watch Kelly’s interview.
Picture this: Saturday mornings, a big bowl of Cookie Crisps nestled in your lap as you sat cross-legged on the couch in front of the TV. It was cartoon time at its finest. You worked hard all week at school, and now it was time to relax, get your munch on, and absorb all the colorful, funny characters and storylines weekend cartoons had to offer. Sure the cartoons today are cute and entertaining with its sometimes adult humor, but there’s something nostalgic about the hilarious, goober-goofy toons we grew up on in the 80′s.
La, la – la, la, la, la. Papa smurf and the rest of the tiny, blue gang had us rooting for them in their mushroom-housed village and booing the hated Gargamel and his pesky pet cat, Azreal.
One of the most beautiful and rewarding things about being a woman is the ability to have a baby – to feel life grow from within and bring a baby into this world to care for and love. So when you struggle to conceive, imagine the heartache and frustration one must feel. According to Redbook magazine, one in eight women in the U.S. will suffer from infertility, and black women are 1.5 times more likely to experience infertility. This is a heart-wrenching experience that hits home for me and many other woman, including celebrities. They ride the same emotional rollercoaster of fertility treatments – from metformin and Glucophage to IVF in an attempt to conceive. Let’s look at 15 starlettes who’ve dealt with this issue firsthand, fearlessly opening up to the public.
Singer Mariah Carey miscarried and quickly sought treatment for infertility. Carey went on progesterone every month, even through the first 10 weeks of her pregnancy. This treatment helped reduce the risk of miscarriage by half, and eventually she welcomed twins Roc and Roe in 2011 .
Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor writer, director and producer, Tyler Perry recently paid a visit to The Steve Harvey Show. During his visit, Steve and Tyler discussed his many accolades and accomplishments as well as plans for the future. When asked what he hasn’t accomplished yet, but hopes to accomplish in the near future, Tyler revealed that he’s just about ready to be a father.
“More than anything I think that it’s fatherhood. I know I would be a great father. I don’t want to work this hard. I don’t want to have all of this and not leave it to my children,” Tyler expressed as the audience smiled and offered approving nods.
He also said that he realizes his current schedule would probably make parenting difficult.
“I also know that as hard as I’m working, doing twenty hours per day, now is not the time. Right now I’m enjoying what I’m doing. I’m enjoying the work. I’m enjoying being a bachelor, so eventually I’ll get there,” he continued.
You can probably guess that tell-it-like-it-is Steve wasn’t going to let him off the hook that easily. He humorously reminded Tyler that he’s not some young cat in his twenties with a whole lot of time to waste.
“Now, we done talked about this before. You don’t got all this time you keep thinking you got,” Steve said.
“Listen, I’m 43, so two more years. By 45 you know who the hell you are, right? You’ve really settled in at 45 so I think two more years,” Tyler said, attempting to bargain with big brother Steve.
Of course, Steve continued to poke fun at him.
“When the boy is 15 and you 60…” Steve said before looking at the floor, allowing his words to settle.
“I’ll hire someone to take him to the basketball court. That’s what I’ll have to do,” Tyler responded before the two shared in what appeared to be a good laugh.
Turn the page to watch Steve keeping tabs on Tyler’s biological clock.
‘Gosh, It’s Not Always Easy:’ Kimora Lee Simmons Talks Maintaining Relationships With The Fathers of Her Children
Kimora Lee Simmons has survived two public splits and still walks around with her head held high. The über confident and undeniably fabulous mother of three recently had a chat with Daily Mail, where she discussed being a single mom, maintaining relationships with her exes and re-entering the dating pool. Peep some of what she had to say in her interview below.
On her break-up with ex Djimon Hounsou:
“Relationships do change throughout the course of your life and I always think in terms of relationships changing and evolving rather than starting and stopping.”
On maintaining healthy relationships with the fathers of her children:
“Kids never go away from your life and if you’ve been married, that person probably never goes away either. You never get rid of anyone and they never really get rid of you,” she said laughing.
“Gosh, it’s not always so easy, but I try to do everything from the viewpoint of what’s best for my kids. I have three kids and two great dads and it’s not always easy, but you have to try to be a little selfless and we manage just fine.”
On dating after her split with Djimon:
“I’m not with anyone at the moment – it’s just my kids and their two dads I guess.”
“I think they are sometimes [intimidated], but men are intimidated by a lot of things, you know, such as jobs and bit of determination. They have a lot of insecurities about who we are, what we have, what we look like, what we’ve accomplished and what we’re capable of because we’re fabulous and capable of doing so much and juggling so much every day.”
“People might be mad I’m saying this, but [men] do have a lot of hang-ups. But that shouldn’t deter you ladies from being great! You don’t have to dumb down – you just have to find a clever, good, secure man. I’ve found a couple – I’ve been lucky – but it’s probably hard for everybody to find that true love of a good man.”
While Kimora probably isn’t everyone’s favorite person in the world, you’ve got to respect the woman for how she handles her affairs. She speaks of both of the men who father her children with the utmost respect and seemingly managed to have two of the most amicable break-ups in Hollywood.
Even a Hollywood starlet like Lauren London battles with the challenges of being a single, working mother.
The new star of BET’s The Game says juggling her work life and raising her 4-year-old son Cameron Carter (dad is rapper Lil’ Wayne) has its challenges. “It’s not easy but I’m not the first to do it,” she told ESSENCE at their sixth annual Black Women in Hollywood luncheon. “I know I can do it; there’s a lot of mothers that work. I got the blueprint from my mother who was a working mom, so I just get it done.”
Aside from her family, London says she finds inspiration from women in the industry like The Game’s creator Mara Brock Akil, a mom of two. “Just working with Mara continues to inspire me to meet the goals that I continue to make for myself,” she said.
Yes, women are definitely finding a way to keep their family’s heads above water. For more with Lauren, including what she thinks about her new character on The Game, head over to Essence.
Are you a single, working mom? Do you have family support or are you doing it alone? How do you make it work?
Tameka Raymond, if you’ll recall, had quite a traumatic 2012.
While she lost primary custody of her two youngest sons with singer Usher, the saddest thing that could happen to a parent occurred: she had to bury her son. Kile Glover, who was only 11 years old, was killed when a man, allegedly a friend of the family, lost control of his jet ski and ran into an inner tube that Glover and another young friend were sitting on.
Well, in what some are considering shocking news, TMZ has learned that 38 year old Jeffrey Simon Hubbard has been arrested for the accident. He was indicted on Thursday by a grand jury and is charged with Homicide by Vessel, Serious Injury by Vessel and Reckless Operation of a Vessel.
Hubbard is currently being held in a Hall County, Georgia jail without bail. He will see a judge at some point this weekend to see if he can be released on bail.
It will be interesting to see what evidence led to this arrest seven months later because by all initial reports by the police, Hubbard was not under the influence of any drugs or alcohol at the time. It, sadly, seemed like a tragic and unfortunate incident.
There has been no comment at this time from Tameka or her ex-husband and Kile’s father, Ryan Glover.
Well, isn’t this surprising and pretty weird.
Love & Hip Hop: NY star Erica Mena was in D.C. Friday night for a hosting gig at Bar 7. She wore a very pretty green dress that showed off her body, including what appears to be a pregnancy bump. The above Instagram picture was captioned with her saying, “Any questions?”
Actually, boo, we do have some questions and concerns.
This is the same Erica Mena who was caught getting into a huge catfight last week at a nail salon. It is pretty clear in these pictures that she and her friends are focusing our attention towards her belly which means she new she was with child whilst engaging in yet another embarrassing moment of her “losing her cool.”
This will make the second child for Erica. She has a son from a previous relationship and if you watch the show, her parenting skills have often come into question.
But here’s the really odd part: According to The YBF, her manager and onscreen boyfriend Rich Dollaz seemed to know nothing about it. When they got in touch with him about it, Rich replied:
“I don’t know about all the pregnancy rumors. Erica was posting pics on IG from Bar 7 in DC and I’m in Houston. So I guess a convo is def in order when we are back in NY.”
He also added that their on again-off again relationship is “mostly off these days.”
Now, it certainly isn’t unheard of that a relationship would be forged simply for show purposes; however, if they’ve spent any intimate time together over the past few months, there’s a chance he could be the father of this child.
So far, this sounds quite messy but seeing as though Erica appears to live for drama, this is right up her alley.
Since the show is still filming, there’s a strong possibility that we’ll see this whole pregnancy situation unfold right on the show.
Oh Love & Hip Hop, how you do go on…
After years of breaking up to make up followed by a very ugly separation, Allen and Tawanna Iverson are officially no longer a union.
An Atlanta judge, according to TMZ, recently signed off on the divorce papers for the former couple who were married for 12 years. They share five children and as this was family court, the judge was very open about his feelings for AI in the divorce decree. His comments included:
“[Iverson] does not know how to manage the children; has little interest in learning to manage the children and has actually, at times, been a hindrance to their spiritual and emotional growth and development.
For example, he has refused to attend to an obvious and serious alcohol problem, which has caused him to do inappropriate things in the presence of the children while impaired.
He has left the children alone without supervision. He has left his young daughters in a hotel room with men who are unknown to the mother.”
The judge awarded Tawanna Iverson full legal and physical custody of the children who range from ages 4 to 17. He is particularly concerned for their well being as it pertains to AI’s drinking so although he has some visitation rights, they are contingent upon him following certain rules. For example, until all of his children become legal, he must not consume any alcohol within 24 hours of the time he has the children.
Taking that a step further, the judge has ordered that Iverson not consume any alcohol, period, over the next 18 months. He has also been ordered to attend AA meetings for a year.
What an unfortunate situation. Iverson’s drinking and alleged gambling problems have been the source of many random news stories over the past few years. His NBA legacy has often been tarnished by his attitude and off the court problems.
He recently turned down an offer from the Texas Legends, a D league team, saying that is not the route for him and he’s always wanted to complete his basketball legacy in the NBA.
Hopefully, he’ll take his parental legacy more seriously and establish a more solid and positive relationship with his children.