The line for this particular train is crowding the platform, thousands of females waiting to board with ticket and camera in hand. You know what I’m referring to, yes? The Great Thirst Trap Train. You’ve seen them: the self-shot camera pics of females everywhere from as young as 14 to only God knows how old seated not-so-comfortably on the edge of the bathroom sink, a trick used to make their rear end look even a fraction of a cheek larger. Or how about the back shot photos taken in elongated mirrors, their bodies contorted to get the exact angle at which their hips, booty and legs look most poppin’?

Throw in an outfit made of nothing but bra and panties (or now more frequently, no clothes at all) and photo captions/song lyrics like, “Body like heaven,” and you’ve got the perfect example of a tried and true thirst trap. A thirst trap is a photograph, status, tweet or the like that aims to entice men and result in compliments galore.  I’ve found that it’s a sexually-motivated social networking tactic that attention-starved young ladies use to boost their self-esteem. Then, once men begin to respond sexually to your photos, they are deemed the “thirsty” ones, “pressed” or overly eager.

Let’s take a step further into this craziness, shall we? I’ve seen girls post statuses (under the guise of “Facebook After Dark”… REALLY?) about how they “like to ride it backwards.” Then, they follow the subsequent drive-by of likes and downright illicit sexual questions posed by horny young men with LOLs, <3s and smiley faces. But if the same young men begin to blow up their inbox, they are now considered “thirsty” and need to chill. And while some men take disrespect to a whole other level – which is NOT okay any way you slice it – this whole phenomenon still blows my ever-loving mind sometimes. Where do we draw a line for ourselves as women? Especially since I’ve seen all sorts of casually sexual behavior stem from these kinds of interactions.

With the growing number of x-rated photos (and videos) girls as young as 14 and 15 are tweeting, posting on Facebook and Instagraming – I’m wondering where (if anyplace) we’ll start setting boundaries for ourselves? Are we going to keep pushing the envelope for the thrill of seeing that little red Facebook notification seconds after we post a bra-busting photo?

I’ve gone weeks with less than five Facebook notifications, informing me that some guy has ‘liked’ my photo. When I was but a wee college freshman  it used to bug me because I saw all the “sexier” girls getting so much attention. My self-esteem was outwardly validated then, so I would wear a shorter skirt and arch my back like an alley cat. That got old really quickly when I realized the kind of attention I was drawing. And not all attention is good attention. Forget what you’ve heard. Learning how to be comfortable in my own skin (and a full set of clothing) gave me confidence, so no matter how many Instagram/Facebook likes I may or may not get, baby I’m good. And honestly, a confident woman in a jumpsuit in her wall photo can be more attractive than a broken woman in a brassiere any day of the week.

There is room to love your body without advertising your goodies. And when you really think about it, why would you want to give away full view of your “assets” to a bunch of men who’ve done nothing to deserve even a peek, let alone the full Maxim spread (and I do mean “spread”) that so many females plaster across the Internet?

Your worth isn’t wrapped up in social networking notifications. It’s in how you view, carry and love yourself. We each set the tone for how we are ultimately viewed and treated both on and offline. So let’s button one more button and think twice about our destination before paying our fare to board The Great Thirst Trap Train.

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Father’s Day is Sunday and if you’re in search for a last minute Father’s Day gift,we have some splendiferous (no, that’s not a real word) options for you, and they’re all in the beauty category. Who says dad doesn’t need to take care of himself and try some pampering? Without much frill, here are four awesome gifts that will show the great man in your life some appreciation.

Shea Moisture Shave Collection for Men

1. Shave Kits

This may seem passé, but shaving for men isn’t as simple as it looks, even if they do it every day. This is especially true for men of color who deal with coarser, curlier hair textures that are prone to ingrown hairs and razor bumps (and those little bumps are not cute). Gifting dad a quality shaving kit will go a long way with keeping his skin smooth and moisturized. You can keep it all natural with Shea Moisture’s Men’s Shave Collection, which is easy to find at any Target or Walmart. Or go luxurious with the Art of Shaving’s Professional Shave Bundle, available at Macy’s and Sephora.

Source: polyvore

2. Skincare

Yes, skincare is different from the shaving kits. In between shaves dad still needs to take care of his face, even the low-maintenance Dial soap man. Carol’s Daughter Acai Hydrating Face Butter is a quality addition to a gift bundle for dad. It’s a great moisturizer (I’m a big fan) that doesn’t leave the face shiny. Dad can simply apply it to any dry patches on his face and keep his face manly and moisturized without the shine.

Source: cumidanciki.com

3. Body Care

Never underestimate the care your father puts into his personal hygiene. We may think our father’s are simple men, but if you place something in their life they may use it and add it to their daily regimen. Men tend to be hard on their feet and every man doesn’t feel comfortable going to get that regular pedicure. So slide dad some foot powder or lotion, such as the soothing Carol’s Daughter Peppermint Foot Lotion. Sending that his way with a fresh pack of socks (and even some nail clippers) is a cute gift that will help the simple man take a step into better foot care. Kiehl’s Cross Terrain collection is another fab option that includes a dry foot cream along with a face cream and body wash, available at Nordstrom.

Source: netikka.net

4. Hair Care

Dad’s hair line and hair health is just as important as our hair. Long before natural hair was the trend, our fathers were the natural trendsetters. So if you are super stuck for a gift just look at your own inventory of hair products, especially if you and your father have a similar simple hair texture. Dad still needs to keep his hair and scalp moisturized so customize a gift bundle including your favorite moisturizing product along with personal sentimental items (a book he use to read to you, music he likes, etc.,). The best gifts are ones that require some thought, and we’re sure he’ll appreciate it.

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Source: Myspace

I’m pretty sure you’ve seen this scrumptious piece of eye candy before, especially if you’re a follower of Tyler Perry’s films and stage plays. Gentles, a model and actor, has shown up in the films, Diary of a Mad Black Woman and Madea’s Family Reunion in small roles. He’s also had larger roles in Perry’s stage plays, playing Nate in Madea Goes to Jail and Nick Lovett in What’s Done in the Dark. You can also check him out in Jennifer Hudson’s video for “Spotlight.” (That was the jam!) But no matter how serious he wanted us to take him in those scenarios, I have to say, I don’t think I was paying attention to anything other than that gorgeous skin, that banging body, and those beautiful locs! I haven’t seen him in a minute though *sad face* So let’s reminisce on the fine-ness that is Ryan Gentles from some of our favorite photographs, and here’s to hoping he’ll come back on the scene ASAP.

Source: magweb.com

The first time I really peeped Mehcad Brooks, he was playing Alfre Woodard’s son on “Desperate Housewives.” It’s safe to say that wasn’t a “hot” role for him (as his family was crazy), but when he popped back up on shows like “True Blood” and “The Game,” he was the ultimate eye candy. And it helped that we finally received a better look at that body. His star has risen big time since he had recurring roles on those shows, but the swag and the sex this guy shows off hasn’t changed. See for yourself!

From NecoleBitchie.com

Not many 38 year olds with 3 kids or 41 year olds can say they have a body like Pilar Sanders (soon-to-be ex-wife of Deion Sanders) or Chilli.  The two were spotted on the set of VH1′s ‘Single Ladies’ recently after filming a few scenes for Season 2.  Chilli showed off major abs in an embellished bra while Pilar wore a pink Herve Leger Rose-Pattern Jacquard Mini Dress and two-toned bodycon dress.

For more about these fierce femmes and their banging bods, visit NecoleBitchie.com.

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A Fulton County Medical Examiner in Buckhead has confirmed that a body found Monday evening is that of missing woman Stacey English, 36.

The ME finished the initial phase of an autopsy on the body Tuesday night, but didn’t confirm that the remains belonged to English until this morning. According Stacey’s family, their daughter received updated dental X-rays two days before she went missing and there was a delay obtaining the new records. The initial autopsy has not revealed her cause of death, and the medical examiner said more tests are needed.

Stacey’s body was discovered in an advanced stage of decomposition and was wedged under a tree only about a mile from the spot where police found her car abandoned still running Dec. 27.

When police notified Stacey’s family that a body was found on Monday, her aunt,  Bernice English Hurks, said finding her niece’s body would be a relief in some ways. “The best thing that we could do right now is to find her regardless of what circumstances are, what conditions are, the best thing to do is to find her.”

At least the family doesn’t have to wait in worry any longer, but hopefully police will be able to give the family more answers surrounding her sad death soon.

Brande Victorian is a blogger and culture writer in New York City. Follower her on Twitter at @be_vic.

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This piece might seem a bit random, but I would love to hear opinions on hair hibernating in the winter…

A few months ago, like many other women, you could catch me in the shower shaving my legs every few days, my armpits every other day, and more (if you know what I mean) in the hopes of having hairless areas and those baby smooth legs that with the help of Shea butter, glisten in the summer sun. Any sign of stubble had to “get got,” and any and every sleeveless tank or top required a check up. Those shaving days required a bit more out of a chick in the morning and out of my morning routine, but when the weather was hitting 80 degrees, I wasn’t complaining about it.

I don’t know if you have checked outside recently, it’s colder than a polar bear’s toenail.

I’m talking cold even in places that are usually somewhat warm year round. I think I spend more time in the shower just trying to warm my bones and revive myself for the work day than I do worried about reaching for the Veet and doing some body lawn mowing. I’m rocking sweaters and jeans for the next few months, so I’ve decided to go on a shaving hiatus for the winter. I’m talking the whole nine yards. No razors on me, no more small nicks and cuts under my arms, just a trim in certain places, and I’ve heard many women say they opt out of the big shave during this time, too. So it so wrong of me? I guess it depends on who you ask.

I’m not trying to go for the Mo’Nique look or anything (though last I checked, she made a big leap and shaved), I’m just hoping to keep my legs from being any colder than they need to be as the temps hit 30 and lower. Not only can a good pair of thermals keep your limbs toasty, but so can a nice layer of womanly hair. And seriously, unless you’re talking about busting out some skirts (which I’m not–at least not without tights), going hairy for a month or two can’t really be that gross.

But there are negatives to doing such a thing also it seems. Some men don’t seem to be fans of Chewbacca chicks (go figure). I noticed when the question was asked on an answers site, a guy tried to claim there was nothing nastier than a woman with hairy legs. Really? NOTHING WORSE? It has always boggled my mind how a chick with a little bit of hair here and there can catch the ire and disgust of a guy whose pubic hair can resemble a wooly coat of fur for the nether regions. But as a single chick at the moment, I’m not too worried about any sort of backlash or reaction to it by a guy. If I have one coming to see me at house soon, the BIC will come out to play.

But on top of some negative manly attention, word on the streets is that shaving is supposed to help exfoliate dry skin that’s ever-present during the winter. If your legs are covered in hair, no matter what you put on your legs early in the day while you’re in get-ready-mode, they will probably feel and appear a bit more scale-y and look like they were dipped in powder after a few hours. And, as a friend of mine pointed out, a lot of hair can trap in heat, and heat can cause you to sweat, and sweating can of course, create must (or mustation as I would like to call it). I like to pride myself on smelling like a ray of sunshine thanks to my love for lightly scented baby powders and statement making perfumes, but it makes sense that the hairier, the funkier you could wind up. I can’t go for all that now…

I seem to struggle to get out of the house (and do so on time) more when it’s colder outside than when it’s warm, so despite the negatives associated with a hairy chick, I think I’ll let my hair grow for a few weeks instead of months, and if the mood strikes me, maybe I’ll shave sooner than later. But if I don’t? Well, I’ll just double up on the baby powder. Who’s with me!? Nobody? Awww man…

Do you often ditch shaving in the winter? Anything wrong with that? What do the fellas have to say?

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We have a few readers who have been calling through Facebook, if not bugging us (I mean that with love) to feature Mr. Michael Jai White. While he’s not on my long list of husbands, I can see why some of our readers would be trying to get at that man: not only is he cute, but that body is a weapon of mass destruction! I just want to squeeze his juicy pectorals! Okay, I might have taken it too far, but you feel me. If you don’t, just check him out and I’m sure you’ll feel the same way very soon.

He wasn’t lying when he came up with that name–ladies really, really do love them some cool James. Seriously, if you put anything with LL’s face on it on our site, it will get thousands of clicks just because–the man is fine. He was fine when he first came out back in the ’80s, and to this day, at the age of 43, he’s still a hottie. He’s got a beautiful smile, a beautiful body, and a beautiful set of lips (OKAY!?), and because his body has been all the rage over the last few years, you’ll be happy to see many of these photos are of him topless (YAY!). Check out the photos and let us know, do you think James Todd Smith could still get the business?

Oversized bags are overdone.  If Erykah Badu was referring to you with her classic song, “Bag Lady,” then consider this your intervention.  Pack only what you truly need for day (or night) in one of fall’s hottest handbag trends–the cross-body bag.

If you consider your style to be classic, bohemian, edgy, artsy or glamorous, then click through the slideshow to find a bag and outfit suggestions that fit you perfectly!

Trust us, the weight lifted from your shoulders (literally) will be heaven sent.