What’s a man to do when his partner’s vagina smells and she doesn’t seem to notice it? It can be very uncomfortable for a man to tell his partner that she’s developed a little stench down there. Men know that telling their partner this, can make her so insecure that she takes sex off of the table for a long time. Men also know that they don’t necessarily know everything about the female body. Maybe there is nothing she can do about it. Maybe it’s due to some chronic condition. Maybe they were just spoiled with their last partner who had an uncharacteristically good-smelling vagina. There are a lot of reasons a man will not outright tell you if your va-jay-jay smells. But those reasons won’t stop him from trying to find other ways to let you know about the issue. Is your partner trying to tell you your va-jay-jay smells?
He won’t go down there
He used to go down on you all of the time but he has recently stopped. He’s even said you don’t need to go down on him if you don’t want to (that’s his guilt talking—why should he get oral if you don’t get any?” When you ask him to go down there, he noticeably cringes.
He insists on flavored lubricant
He panics if you are out of flavored lubricant. If he sees you ordering some online he half-joking/half-serious asks if they have any mint-flavored lube. He has actually just taken over all lube-buying responsibilities, just to make sure he gets the one he wants.
He only wants to have shower sex
Your partner seems all about the shower sex lately, or the bathtub sex, or the Jacuzzi sex. He just really seems to want to involve water in sex even if he just stepped out of the shower before you initiated sex.
He praises showering before sex
He makes a point to always shower before sex and goes on and on about how nice it feels to shower before sex. He really seems to want you to know how much better he feels if he showers before sex. He’s probably trying to lead by example.
He’s stops everything mid-foreplay
Just as things have been getting really hot and heavy—you’re making out and taking each other’s clothes off—your partner stops everything. Actually, he stops everything the second you take your underwear off. He suddenly has a stomach ache or realizes he needs to be somewhere.
Sex is becoming infrequent
If you know your partner would never cheat on you, and you know he is still attracted to you, but he just doesn’t want to have sex, it couldn’t hurt to ask him if there is anything about you that is putting him off. Some men have a hard time stating it, so you have to lay it out there for him in a yes or no question format.
He asks if you’ve been to the gyno recently
Your partner keeps asking when the last time was you went to the gynecologist. He wants to confirm and reconfirm that your gyno said everything was okay or didn’t find anything weird. He insists maybe you should go back—that it couldn’t hurt, right?
He’s canceled going down on you
Your partner has been kissing your stomach, your thighs and then…oh…he’s coming back up. It was almost like he made a rapid U-turn with his neck. Is this some new dance move?
He keeps asking if he smells okay down there
Using a reverse tactic, your partner keeps asking you if he smells okay down-south. He tells you repeatedly that you can let him know if he doesn’t. In fact, he keeps mentioning that he wants you to feel totally comfortable letting him know if there’s anything he is doing down there, from hygiene to maintenance, that turns you off. He is priming you for when he finally tells you that you smell down there.
He buys you special soap
He is really into buying you special soap lately. Special soap seems to be his favorite gift idea. He insists it just really turns him on when you smell like peppermint or lavender, and that you should give yourself a rinse with the stuff before sex.
He’s all about doggy style
The only way he is getting through sex at this point is by choosing positions that position your vagina away from his nose. You’ve tried to do the on-the-back thing where you put your legs over his shoulders and he quickly flipped you over.
He offers to clean your underwear
He seems to be doing an awful lot of laundry lately and whenever he does he asks if you have anything you want him to throw in for you. Maybe some underwear? Surely you have some underwear that needs cleaning, he says. Just let him clean your underwear, he insists. Give him the underwear!
He has tried cleaning it for you
When you have showered together, your partner has cleaned your vagina for you. You thought he was going in for some foreplay, but he ended up doing a very thorough job of sudsing you up down there.
He opens all the windows before sex
Your partner goes around the apartment, opening every window and turning on every fan before sex. He’s trying to just air out the smell.
He buys you a douche
Here’s another odd little gift your partner buys you: a douche. He says the woman at the store says these are all the rage.